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He said, — and in the kindest Calmuck tone,

“ Why, Johnson, what the devil do you mean By bringing women here? They shall be shown

All the attention possible, and seen In safety to the waggons, where alone

In fact they can be safe. You should have been Aware this kind of baggage never thrives : Save wed a year, I hate recruits with wives.”


“ May it please your excellency,” thus replied

Our British friend, “ these are the wives of others, And not our own. I am too qualified

By service with my military brothers
To break the rules by bringing one's own bride

Into a camp: I know that nought so bothers
The hearts of the heroic on a charge,
As leaving a small family at large.


“ But these are but two Turkish ladies, who

With their attendant aided our escape, And afterwards accompanied us through

A thousand perils in this dubious shape. To me this kind of life is not so new;

To them, poor things, it is an awkward scrape I therefore, if you wish me to fight freely, Request that they may both be used genteelly."


Meantime these two poor girls, with swimming eyes,

Look'd on as if in doubt if they could trust Their own protectors; nor was their surprise

Less than their grief (and truly not less just) To see an old man, rather wild than wise

In aspect, plainly clad, besmear’d with dust, Stript to his waistcoat, and that not too clean, More fear'd than all the sultans ever seen.


For every thing seem'd resting on his nod,

As they could read in all eyes. Now to them, Who were accustom'd, as a sort of god,

To see the sultan, rich in many a gem, Like an imperial peacock stalk abroad

(That royal bird, whose tail's a diadem,) With all the pomp of power, it was a doubt How power

could condescend to do without.

John Johnson, seeing their extreme dismay,

Though little versed in feelings oriental,
Suggested some slight comfort in his way:

Don Juan, who was much more sentimental,
Swore they should see him by the dawn of day,
Or that the Russian


repent And, strange to say, they found some consolation In this for females like exaggeration.

all :

LXXVI. And then with tears, and sighs, and some slight kisses,

They parted for the present- these to await, According to the artillery's hits or misses,

What sages call Chance, Providence, or Fate(Uncertainty is one of many blisses,

A mortgage on Humanity's estate)
While their beloved friends began to arm,
To burn a town which never did them harm.

Suwarrow,— who but saw things in the gross,

Being much too gross to see them in detail,
Who calculated life as so much dross,

And as the wind a widow'd nation's wail, And cared as little for his army's loss

(So that their efforts should at length prevail) As wife and friends did for the boils of Job, What was't to him to hear two women sob?


Nothing.– The work of glory still went on

In preparations for a cannonade As terrible as that of Ilion,

If Homer had found mortars ready made; But now, instead of slaying Priam's son,

We only can but talk of escalade, [bullets; Bombs, drums, guns, bastions, batteries, bayonets, Hard words, which stick in the soft Muses' gullets.


Oh, thou eternal Homer! who couldst charm

All ears, though long; all ages, though so short, By merely wielding with poetic arm

Arms to which men will never more resort, Unless gunpowder should be found to harm

Much less than is the hope of every court, Which now is leagued young Freedom to annoy ; But they will not find Liberty a Troy:


Oh, thou eternal Homer ! I have now

To paint a siege, wherein more men were slain, With deadlier engines and a speedier blow,

Than in thy Greek gazette of that campaign; And yet, like all men else, I must allow,

To vie with thee would be about as vain As for a brook to cope with ocean's flood; But still we moderns equal you

in blood;


If not in poetry, at least in fact;

And fact is truth, the grand desideratum !
Of which, howe'er the Muse describes each act,

There should be ne'ertheless a slight substratum. But now the town is going to be attack’d;

Great deeds are doing—how shall I relate 'em ? Souls of immortal generals ! Phæbus watches To colour up his rays from your despatches. .

Oh, ye great bulletins of Bonaparte !

Oh, ye less grand long lists of kill'd and wounded!
Shade of Leonidas, who fought so hearty,
When my poor Greece was once, as now, sur-

rounded !
Oh, Cæsar's Commentaries ! now impart, ye

Shadows of glory! (lest I be confounded)
A portion of your fading twilight hues,
So beautiful, so fleeting, to the Muse.


I mean,

When I call “ fading" martial immortality,


every age and every year, And almost every day, in sad reality,

Some sucking hero is compellid to rear, Who, when we come to sum up

the totality Of deeds to human happiness most dear, Turns out to be a butcher in great business, Afflicting young folks with a sort of dizziness.


Medals, rank, ribands, lace, embroidery, scarlet,

Are things immortal to immortal man,
As purple to the Babylonian harlot:

An uniform to boys is like a fan
To women; there is scarce a crimson varlet

But deems himself the first in Glory's van.
But Glory's glory; and if you would find
What that is—ask the pig who sees the wind!

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