CONFIDENCE BETWEEN HOST AND GUEST. 233

cannot affect them unpleasantly. Better omit relating the most entertaining event of your visit, than give circulation to anything that will violate the privacy of your friend's family. In like manner, a guest should be protected from the gossip of the world by the friends she visits; and those foibles which are only found out by the intimacy of daily communion, should never be exposed to indifferent persons. Whatever good is there discovered may be commented upon; but let silence cover whatever is amiss.

The attentions which young ladies receive as the guests of those who are older, may always be so graciously accepted and acknowledged, as to show that the guest fully appreciates the hospitality; and as a proof that it is held in remembrance, some little offering of gratitude should be made after the visit. No matter how well supplied your friends may be with the comforts and luxuries of life, nor how small your means are, you can always think of something which you can present and they accept, and though it be only a pincushion or a guard-chain, of your own making, it will have a certain value, as the expression of the gratitude which it becomes you to feel.

234

CHAPTER XIX.

TRAVELLING.'

PUNCTUALITY.-PACKING.-SELF-POSSESSION.-ANECDOTE.

-ANOTHER.-AVOID A RUSH.-ANECDOTE OF A FATHER AND DAUGHTER.

IMPORTANT as punctuality is to the fulfilment of all our social duties, and the improvement of our time, it is especially necessary to the comfort of persons when travelling.

The greatest inconvenience to a whole party is sometimes occasioned by the want of punctuality in a single member of it. Those, therefore, who set out on a journey with friends, should feel that they enter into an agreement to sacrifice their own convenience and pleasure, whenever it would interfere with punctuality; and no lovely prospect, no desirable purchase, no wish to see sights, should prevent your return from a walk at the hour appointed for departure. The necessity of punctuality at meals, and at the fixed hours agreed on by all, should be so prominent an idea, that the pen should be thrown down, though only a line be wanting to complete the day's journal: the arrangements of dress should be calculated to a nicety, and any readjustment postponed, that would interfere with being ready at the time prescribed. Young ladies who are not punctual, think it a sufficient excuse, to say they could not be ready sooner, because they had to mend a glove, or put on new strings to a cap, or to get something out of their trunk after they had fastened it down; but all such excuses are wholly inadmissible. The determination to be true to our engagements should be so absolute, as to make us provide against all such con

tingencies, by beginning our operations so early as to leave us time for accidents, or time to spare. The unpunctual never allow themselves time enough, and the only way to cure themselves of this fault in judgment is, to begin by allowing themselves double the portion they think they shall need; and if, when entirely ready, they have any time left, to use it in the best way they can. Nothing wears more on the spirits of those who are the heads of the party, than want of punctuality in the younger members of it; I have known the whole pleasure of a day marred in this way, by the fault of one.

The art of packing a trunk well is very necessary to the comfort of travelling. It enables a person to carry many more things in a given space, than can be done without it; it prevents your clothes being injured or tumbled, and helps you to find what you want, without deranging the whole contents of your trunk. It is too much of a practical affair to be taught by written rules; but if you can only be impressed with the desirableness of understanding it, you can learn it from some experienced friend. Those persons acquire it most readily, who have a correct eye for form and space, and, therefore, one who knows how to draw, will learn to pack more easily than one who never measured distances by her

eye.

It is a good rule in travelling, never to unpack your trunk unnecessarily, but to keep those things on the top that you will need first; and when you are to set off early in the morning, to pack your trunk the night before, and leave out only such things as can be put in your carpet-bag.

It is best not to put your watch under your pillow at night, unless you are always in the habit of doing so, and can depend on yourself for not forgetting it in the morning.

Self-possession in the time of difficulty, is an im

portant quality of the mind, and can be very successfully cultivated. I have known very timid children to become, by proper self-discipline, calm and courageous in danger, and to acquire, by degrees, that presence of mind which has often been the means of preserving life. No one is fit to travel, who has not acquired enough of it to refrain from screaming when alarmed. Whatever the feelings may be, there should be sufficient self-command to keep silence; for in many situations the danger is greatly increased by the shrieks of women; as in the case of runaway horses, the collision of coaches, or of boats, &c. I recollect an instance of a coachman's life being sacrificed, in consequence of a lady's

screams.

A mother and daughter returning home from a morning ride in their own carriage, were alarmed by perceiving that the horses were unruly, and immediately the young lady began to scream; this frightened the horses, and rendered them entirely unmanageable; the coachman was thrown from his seat, and so severely injured, that he died in a few days. The ladies were not hurt, but they had the pain of hearing the dying man say, that he should have managed the horses, "if Miss Louisa had not screamed so." What a sad recol

lection to carry through life!

The reverse of this was the experience of another lady of my acquaintance. She was going through the streets of a large city in her own carriage, and stopped at the entrance of a lane, down which she sent her coachman on an errand, without giving him an opportunity of placing some one at the horses' heads; before the man returned, the horses trotted slowly off. The lady had sufficient presence of mind to make no outcry, but simply beckoned to the people passing by to come to her aid; for some time no one noticed her, and her horses, having taken the direction of home, began to quicken their pace; the danger increased every moment,

still they were not alarmed by any noise within the carriage, and at last some observed there was no coachman on the box, and stopped them before any accident occurred. A lady addicted to screaming might have been seriously injured, if not killed, by the horses running away at full speed, and dashing the carriage against something in their way.

It is for the most part safer to remain in a carriage, when the horses run away with it, than to attempt to get out whilst it is in motion; and better not to put the head or arms out of the windows, but to sit quietly within, with your arms close to your body; and then, if the carriage is overturned, you will run less risk of breaking your limbs, than you would if you were holding on with all your might.

The various kinds of danger to which one is subject, in steam-boat accidents, make it difficult to say beforehand what course is best; but there is one general rule which may be given, and that is, never to join in a rush to any one part of the boat. By keeping aloof, and retaining your self-possession, you will be ready to take advantage of whatever may occur; whereas, by following the crowd, you are liable to be infected by their panic, and to be hurried into some imprudent step.

I am acquainted with a young lady, who escaped much suffering by adhering to this rule. She and her father were on board a steam-boat, when it ran against another vessel, and was so much injured as to sink rapidly. There was a general rush of all the passengers to the bows of the boat; she alone remained at the stern with her father; both were perfectly calm, and provided themselves with buoyant articles to assist them in floating, when it should become necessary to commit themselves to the water. Whilst thus aloof from the crowd, a little boat approached; the father hailed it,