question, I joined the cry" The question, the question," says I. A member spied me; cleared the gallery; got hustled by my brother spectators-obliged to scud. Oh! it would never do for me. Vor. But you must learn patience. Y. Rap. Then make me Speaker; if that wouldn't teach me patience, nothing would. Vor. Do you dislike, sir, parliamentary eloquence? O. Rap. Šir, I never heard one of your real downright parliamentary speeches in my life, never. [Fawns. Y. Rap. By your yawning, I should think you had heard a great many. Vor. Oh, how lucky! At last, I shall get my dear speech spoken. Sir, I am a member, and I mean to it. Y. Rap. Keep moving. Vor. Why, I mean to speak, I assure you; and- Vor. What, speak my speech? That I will; I'll speak Y. Rap. Oh, the devil! Don't yawn so. [To Old Rapid. O. Rap. I never get a comfortable nap, never! Y. Rap. You have a dev'lish good chance now. Confound all speeches. Oh! Vor. Pray be seated. [They sit on each side Vortex. Now, we'll suppose that the chair [Pointing to a chair. 0. Rap. Suppose it the chair! why it is a chair, au't it? Vor. Pshaw! I mean Y. Rap. He knows what you mean-tis his humour. Y. Rap. Oh, remarkably brilliant, indeed! [Significantly to his father. Vor. What, you are a wit, sir! O. Rap. A what? Yes, I am; I am a wit. Vor. Well, now I'll begin. Oh, what a delicious moment! The house when they approve cry, "Hear him, hear him!" I only give you a hint, in case any thing should strike. [Aside. Y. Rap. Push on. I can never stand it. Vor. Now, I shall charm them. [Addresses the chair.] "Sir, had I met your eye at an earlier hour, I should not have blink'd the present question; but having caught what. has fallen from the other side, I shall scout the idea of going over the usual ground." What, no applause yet? [Aside. During this, Old Rapid has fallen asleep, and Young Rupid, after shewing great fretfulness and impatience, runs to the back scene, throws up the window, and looks out.] Y. Rap. [Looking round.] Hear him! hear him! O. Rap. Oh, Neddy, for shame of yourself to fall asleep ! I mean, to look out of the window. I am very sorry, sir, anything should go across the grain. I say, Ned, smooth him down! Y. Rap. I will. What the devil shall I say. The fact is, sir, I heard the cry of fire-upon-the-the-the water, and Vor. Well, well. But do you wish to hear the end of my speech? Y. Rap. Upon my honour, I do. Vor. Then we'll only suppose this little interruption a message from the lords, or something of that sort. [They sit, Young Rapid fretful. Vor. Where did I leave off? Y. Rap. Oh! I recollect; at-"I therefore briefly conclude with moving-an adjournment." [Rising. Vor. Nonsense! no such thing. [Putting him down in a chair.] Oh! I remember! " I shall therefore proceed; and, I trust, without interruption." Enter JOHN, R. John. Dinner's on the table, sir. Vor. Get out of the room, you villain!" Without interruption" John. I say, sir Y. Rap. Hear him! hear him! John. Dinner is waiting. Y. Rap. [Jumping up.] Dinner waiting! Come along, sir. Vor. Never mind the dinner. Y. Rap. But I like it smoking. O. Rap. So do I. Be it ever so little, let me have it hot. Vor. Won't you hear my speech? Y. Rap. To be sure we will--but now to dinner. Come, we'll move together. Capital speech! Push on, sir. Come along, dad. Push him on, dad. [Exeunt, forcing Vortex out, R. SCENE III.-An ancient Hall. Enter SIR HUBERT, leaning on CHARLES STANLEY, R. Cha. (L.) Take comfort, sir. Sir Hub. (R.) Where shall I find it, boy? To live on my estate, is ruin; to part with it, death. My heart is twined round it. I've been a patriarch of my tribe-the Scourge of the aggressor-the protector of the injur'd!Can I forego these dignities? My old grey-headed servants, too, whose only remaining hope is to lay their bones near their lov'd master, how shall I part with them? prate, boy; 'tis the privilege of these white hairs. I Enter JAMES, R. delivers a Letter to Sir Hubert, who reads it with great agitation. Exit James R. Cha. Ah! what is it shakes you, sir? That letter ! Sir Hub. Nothing, my dear boy!-'tis infirmity !—I shall soon be better. Cha Excuse me, dear sir. [Takes the letter, and reads.] "Mr. Vortex, at the request of Mr. Rapid, informs Sir "Hubert Stanley it is inconvenient for him to advance more Mr. Vortex laments Sir Hubert's money on mortgage. "to relieve "pecuniary embarrassments,"— damnation "which, he will purchase the castle and estate." Sooner shall its massy ruins crumble me to dust. Don't despond, my father! bear up! Enter FRANK, running L. his face bloody. Fra. Oh, sur!-at Nabob's table they've been so abusing your father! Cha. Ah! Fra. And I've been fighting Chd. Hush! Sir Hub. What's his business? Cha. Oh, sir! [Concealing his agitation.] My friend Frank consults me on a love affair; and I must not betray his confidence. In his hurry, he fell. Wasn't it so ? [Significantly. Fra. Ees, sur, ees. Sir Hub. You are not hurt, young man ? Fra. No, sir.-Thank heaven! my head be a pure hard one. Sir Hub. My boy, don't stay from me long. [Exit, R. Cha. Now, good Frank, ease my tortured mind. What of my father? Fra. Why, your honour, Mr. Bronze came laughing out of dining-room, and says, 66 Dom'me, how the old baronet "has been roasted!" So, sur, I not knowing what they could mean by roasting a Christian, axed. "Why," says he, grinning, they voted, that it was a pity the dignity of the bloody haud interfered, or the old beggar might set up a shop." Cha. What! Fra. The old beggar might set up a shop. Cha. Unmanuer'd, cowardly babblers! Fra. And that you, sur, would make a dapper 'prentice. Cha. I heed not that. But, when I forgive a father's wrongs Fra. So, says I, Dom'me, if young 'squire had been among them, he would have knocked all their heads together. Now, wouldn't you, sur, have knocked their heads together? Then they all laughed at me e; which somehow made all the blood in my body come into my knuckles. So says I," Mr. Bronze, suppose a case-suppose me young 'Squire Stanley; now, say that again about his honour'd father." So he did; and I lent him such a drive o' the face; and I was knocking all their heads together pretty tightish, till the cook laid me flat wi'the poker: then they all fell upon me; and when I could fight no longer, I fell a-crying, and ran to tell your honour. Cha. Thanks, my affectionate lad! Return to the Na bob's to-day. Fra. I be sartain, I shall never do any good there. Cha. To-morrow, you shall live with me. I shall dismiss all my servants; my circumstances require it. Fra. What! all but me? What! I do all the work?Lord, lord, how glad I be, sur, you can't afford to keep any body but I. Cha. Good Frank, farewell!-Hold-here. [Presenting a purse. Fra. [Refusing.] Nay, pray'ee, sur, dan't you beheave unkind to me. I be a poor lad, that do worship and love you; not a spy for the lucre of gain. kindly, and don't gi' me a farding. Pray use me [Exeunt, R. ACT IV. SCENE I.-An Apartment in Vortex's House. Table and Two Chairs. me up "Give Enter VORTEX, in great terror, reading a Letter, L. Vor. Dear me! here's a terrible affair! [Reads.] the author of the slander on my father,"-that was myself; I never cau find in my heart to give myself up"or personally answer the consequences.-CHARLES STAN LEY.' Oh dear! since I find my words are taken down, I must be more parliamentary in my language. What shall I do? I can't fight; my poor head won't bear it; it might be the death of me. Y. Rap. [Without, R.] Huzza, my fine fellows! bravo! Vor. Eh! egad, a fine thought. Young Rapid is loaded muzzle high with champagne. I'll tell him he said the words, and make him own them. I've persuaded him into a marriage with my daughter: after that, the devil's in't if I can't persuade him into a duel. Enter YOUNG RAPID, tipsy, R. Y. Rap. (R.) Here I am, tip-top spirits-ripe for any thing. Vor. (L.) How did you like my champaigne ? Y. Rap. Oh! it suits me exactly a man is such a damn'd long while getting tipsy with other wine. Champaigne settles the business directly-it has made meVor. Lively, I see. Y. Rap. Lively-it has made me like a sky-rocket.— Well, how did I behave? Quite easy, was'n't I? Push'd on-at every thing-barr'd prosing. Jolly dogs withinthe fat parson's a fine fellow-kept the bottle movingsaid a nice short grace. Vor. Well, and did you lose at play the five hundred pounds I lent you? Y. Rap. As easy as could be. Vor. That was lucky. Y. Rap. Very; particularly for those who won it. Vor. Well, now you'll do. Y. Rap. Huzza! I'm a finish'd man. [Staggering and strutting about Vor. You only want a quarrel to make you |