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No time, no change, no future flame, shall move Nor happiness can I, nor misery feel,
The well-plac d basis of my lasting love. From any turn of her fantastic wheel:
O powerful virtue! O victorious fair!

Friendship's great laws, and Love's superior powers, At least, excuse a trial too severe:

Must mark the color of my future hours. Receive the triumph, and forget the war.

From the events which thy commands create, No banish'd man, condemnd in woods to rove, I must my blessings or my sorrows date ; Entreats thy pardon, and implores thy love: And Henry's will must dictate Emma's fate. No perjur'd knight desires to quit thy arms,

Yet, while with close delight and inward pride Fairest collection of thy sex's charms,

(Which from the world my careful soul shall hide) Crown of my love, and honor of my youth! I see thee, lord and end of my desire, Henry, thy Henry, with eternal truth,

Exalted high as virtue can require ; As thou may'st wish, shall all his life employ, With power invested, and with pleasure cheerd; And found his glory in his Emma's joy.

Sought by the good, by the oppressor fear'd; In me behold the potent Edgar's heir,

Loaded and blest with all the affluent store, Ilustrious earl: him terrible in war

Which human vows at smoking shrines implore; Let Loyre confess, for she has felt his sword, Grateful and humble grant me to employ And trembling fled before the British lord. My lise subservient only to thy joy ; Him great in peace and wealth fair Deva knows; And at my death to bless thy kindness shown For she amidst his spacious meadows flows; To her, who of mankind could love but thee alone Inclines her urn upon his fatlen'd lands; And sees his numerous herds imprint her sands. While thus the constant pair alternate said, And thou, my fair, my dove, shalt raise thy Joyful above them and around them play'd thought

Angels and sportive Loves, a numerous crowd ; To greatness next to empire: shalt be brought Smiling they clapt their wings, and low they bow'd. With solemn pomp to my paternal seat;

They tumbled all their liule quivers o'er, Where peace and plenty on thy word shall wait. To choose propitious shafts, a precious store ; Music and song shall wake the marriage-day; That, when their god should take his future darts, And, whilst the priests accuse the bride's delay, To strike (however rarely) constanı hearts, Myrtles and roses shall obstruct her way. His happy skill might proper arms employ, Friendship shall still thy evening feasts adorn; All tipt with pleasure, and all wing'd with joy : And blooming Peace shall ever bless thy morn. And those, they vowd, whose lives should imitate Succeeding years their happy race shall run, These lovers' constancy, should share their fate. And Age, unheeded, by delight come on:

The queen of beauty stopt her bridled doves; While yet superior Love shall mock his power : Approv'd the little labor of the Loves ; And when old Time shall turn the fated hour, Was proud and pleas'd the mutual vow to hear; Which only can our well-tied knot unfold, And to the triumph call’d the god of war: What rests of both, one sepulchre shall hold. Soon as she calls, the god is always near.

Hence then for ever from my Emma's breast, Now, Mars," she said, “let Fame exalt her (That heaven of softness, and that seat of rest,)

voice : Ye doubts and fears, and all that know to move Nor let thy conquests only be her choice : Tormenting grief, and all that trouble love, But, when she sings great Edward from the field Scatter'd by winds recede, and wild in forests rove. Return'd, the hostile spear and captive shield

In Concord's temple hung, and Gallia taught to

yield; EMMA.

And when as prudent Saturn shall complete O day, the fairest sure that ever rose !

The years design'd to perfect Britain's state, Period and end of anxious Emma's woes! The swift-wing'd power shall take her trump again, Sire of her joy, and source of her delight; To sing her favorite Anna's wondrous reign; 0! wing'd with pleasure, take thy happy flight, To recollect unwearied Marlborough's loils, And give each future morn a tincture of thy white. Old Rufus' hall unequal to his spoils ; Yet tell thy votary, potent queen of love, The British soldier from his high command Henry, my Henry, will he never rove?

Glorious, and Gaul thrice vanquish'd by his hand
Will he be ever kind, and just, and good ? Let her, at least, perform what I desire;
And is there yet no mistress in the wood ?

With second breath the vocal brass inspire;
None, none there is; the thought was rash and vain; And tell the nations, in no vulgar strain,
A false idea, and a fancied pain.

What wars I manage, and what wreaths I gain. Doubt shall for ever quit my strengthen'd heart, And, when thy tumults and thy fights are past; And anxious jealousy's corroding smart;

And when thy laurels at my feet are cast; Nor other inmate shall inhabit there,

Faithful may'st thou, like British Henry, prove : But soft Belief, young Joy, and pleasing Care. And, Emma-like, let me return thy love.

Hence let the tides of plenty ebb and flow, Renown'd for truth, let all thy sons appear; And Fortune's various gale unheeded blow. And constant beauty shall reward their care." If at my feet the suppliant goddess stands,

Mars smild, and bow'd : the Cyprian deity And sheds her treasure with unwearied hands; Turn'd to the glorious ruler of the sky; Her present favor cautious I'll embrace,

" And thou,” she smiling said, “great god of days And not unthankful use the proffer'd grace : And verse, behold my deed, and sing my praise ; If she reclaims the temporary boon,

As on the British earth, my favorite isle,
And tries her pinions, fluttering to be gone; Thy gentle rays and kindest influence smile,
Secure of mind, I'll obviate her intent,

Through all her laughing fields and verdant groves And unconcern'd return the goods she lent. Proclaim with joy these memorable loves.





From every annual course let one great day The eyes might have conspir'd her ruin,
To celebrated sports and floral play

And she not known what they were doing.
Be set aside ; and, in the softest lays

Foolish it had been, and unkind, or thy poetic sons, be solemn praise

That they should see, and she be blind. And everlasting marks of honor paid

" Wise Nature likewise, they suppose, To the true lover, and the Nut-brown Maid." Has drawn two conduits down our nuse :

Could Alma else with judgment tell
When cabbage stinks, or roses smell?
Or who would ask for her opinion
Between an oyster and an onion ?

For from most bodies, Dick, you know,

Some little bits ask leave to flow;

And, as through these canals they roll,

Bring up a sample of the whole;

Like footmen running before coaches,

To tell the inn what lord approaches.

“ By nerves about our palate plac'd, IN THREE CANTOES,

She likewise judges of the taste.

Else (dismal thought!) our warlike men
Πάντα γέλως, και πάντα κόνις, και πάντα το μηδέν. Might drink thick port for fine champagne ;
Πάντα γάρ εξ αλόγων εστι τα γιγνόμενα.

And our ill-judging wives and daughters
Incert, ap. Slobaum.

Mistake small-beer for citron-waters.

“Hence, too, that she might better hear, CANTO I.

She sets a drum at either ear: MATTHEW* met Richard,t when or where

And, loud or gentle, harsh or sweet, From story is not mighty clear:

Are but th' alarums which they beat. Of many knotty points they spoke,

Last, to enjoy her sense of feeling, And pro and con by turns they took.

(A thing she much delights to deal in)

A thousand little nerves she sends
Rats half the manuscript have eat:
Dire hunger! which we still regret.

Quite to our toes and fingers' ends ; 0! may they ne'er again digest

And these, in gratitude, again The horrors of so sad a feast !

Return their spirits to the brain; Yet less our grief, if what remains,

In which their figure being printed, Dear Jacob,f by thy care and pains

(As just before, I think, I hinted,) Shall be to future times convey'd.

Alma. inform’d, can try the case,
It thus begins :

As she had been upon the place.
Here Matthew said,

“ Thus, while the judge gives different jonmeys “ Alma in verse, in prose the Mind,

To country counsel and attorneys, By Aristotle's pen defin'd,

He on the bench in quiet sits, Throughout the body, squat or tall,

Deciding, as they bring the writs. Is, bona fide, all in all.

The pope thus prays and sleeps at Rome And yet, slap-dash, is all again

And very seldom stirs from home : In every sinew, nerve, and vein:

Yet, sending forth his holy spies, Runs here and there, like Hamlet's ghost;

And having heard what they advise, While everywhere she rules the roast.

He rules the church's blest dominions,

And sets men's faith by his opinions. “This system, Richard, we are told, The men of Oxford firmly hold.

• The scholars of the Stagyrite, The Cambridge wits, you know, deny

Who for the old opinion fight,

Would make their modern friends confess
With ipse dixit to comply.

The difference but from more to less.
They say, (for in good truth they speak
With small respect of that old Greek,)

The Mind, say they, while you sustain
That, putting all his words together,

To hold her station in the brain; "Tis three blue beans in one blue bladder.

You grant, at least, she is extended : “Alma, they strenuously maintain,

Ergo the whole dispute is ended. Sits cock-horse on her throne, the brain;

For, till to-morrow should you plead, And from that seat of thought dispenses

From form and structure to the head,

The Mind as visibly is seen
Her sovereign pleasure to the senses.
Two optic nerves, they say, she ties,

Extended through the whole machine.

Why should all honor then be ta'en
Like spectacles, across the eyes ;
By which the spirits bring her word,

From lower parts to load the brain
Whene'er the balls are fix'd or stirr'd,

When other limbs, we plainly see, How quick at park and play they strike;

Each in his way as brisk as he ? The duke they court; the toast they like;

For music, grant the head receive in, And at St. James's turn their grace

It is the artist's hand that gave it, From former friends, now out of place.

And, though the skull may wear the laurel “Without these aids, to be more serious,

The soldier's arm sustains the quarrel.

Besides, the nostrils, ears, and eyes, Her power, they hold, had been precarious :

Are not his parts, but his allies;

Ev’n what you hear the tongue proclaim
Himself. † Mr. Shelton. 1 Tonson. Comes ab origine from them.

What could the head perform alone,

Still to their size he aim'd his skill : If all their friendly aids were gone?

Else, pr’ythee, who would pay his bill ? A foolish figure he must make;

“Nexi, Dick, if Chance herself should vary, Do nothing else but sleep and ache.

Observe, how matters would miscarry : "Nor matters it, that you can show

Across your eyes, friend, place your shoes ; How to the head the spirits go;

Your spectacles upon your toes : Those spirits started from some goal,

Then you and Memmius shall agree Before they through the veins could roll.

How nicely men would walk, or see. Now, we should hold them much to blame,

“But Wisdom, peevish and cross-grain'd, If they went back, before they came.

Must be oppos'd, to be sustain'd; “ If, therefore, as we must suppose,

And still your knowledge will increase, They came from fingers, and from toes ;

As you make other people's less. Or teeth, or fingers, in this case,

In arms and science 'tis the same; of Numskull's self should take the place : Our rival's hurts create our fame. Disputing fair, you grant thus much,

At Faubert's, if disputes arise That all sensation is but touch.

Among the champions for the prize, Dip but your toes into cold water,

To prove who gave the fairer butt, Their correspondent teeth will chatter :

John shows the chalk on Robert's coat And, strike the bottom of your feet,

So, for the honor of your book, You set your head into a heat.

It tells where other folks mistook : The bully beat, and happy lover,

And, as their notions you confound, Confess that feeling lies all over.

Those you invent get farther ground. “ Note here, Lucretius dares to teach

“ The commentators on old Ari(As all our youth may learn from Creech) stotle ('tis urg'd) in judgment vary: That eyes were made, but could not view, They to their own conceits have brought Nor hands embrace, nor feet pursue :

The image of his general thought; But heedless Nature did produce

Just as the melancholic eye The members first, and then the use.

Sees fleets and armies in the sky; What each must act was yet unknown,

And to the poor apprentice' ear Till all is mov'd by Chance alone.

The bells sound, Whittington, lord-mayor.' “A man first builds a country-seat,

The conjurer thus explains his scheme; Then finds the walls not good to eat.

Thus spirits walk, and prophets dream; Another plants, and wondering sees

North Britons thus have second-sight; Nor books nor medals on his trees.

And Germans, free from gun-shot, fight. Yet poet and philosopher

“ Theodoret and Origen, Was he, who durst such whims aver.

And fifty other learned men, Blest, for his sake, be human reason,

Attest, that, if their comments find That came at all, though late in season.

The traces of their master's mind, But no man, sure, e'er left his house,

Alma can ne'er decay nor die: And saddled Ball, with thoughts so wild, This flatly t’ other sect deny ; To bring a midwife to his spouse,

Simplicius, Theophrast, Durand, Before he knew she was with child.

Great names, but hard in verse to stand. And no man ever reapt his corn,

They wonder men should have mistook Or from the oven drew his bread,

The tenets of their master's book, Ere hinds and bakers yet were born,

And hold, that Alma yields her breath, That taught them both to sow and knead. O'ercome by age, and seiz'd by death. Before they're ask’d, can maids refuse ?

Now which were wise ? and which were fools ? Can"—“ Pray," says Dick, “hold in your Muse. Poor Alma sits between two stools : While you Pindaric truths rehearse,

The more she reads, the more perplext; She hobbles in alternate verse."

The comment ruining the text: " Verse,” Mat replied ; “is that my care ?"- Now fears, now hopes, her doubtful fate : “Go on," quoth Richard, “soft and fair."

But, Richard, let her look to that, “This looks, friend Dick, as Nature had Whilst we our own affairs pursue. But exercis'd the salesman's trade;

“ These different systems, old or new, As if she haply had sat down,

A man with half an eye may see, And cut out clothes for all the town;

Were only formd to disagree. Then sent them out to Monmouth-street,

Now, to bring things to fair conclusion, To try what persons they would fit.

And save much Christian ink's effusion, But every free and licens'd tailor

Let me propose an healing scheme, Would in this thesis find a failure.

And sail along the middle stream; Should whims like these his head perplex, For, Dick, if we could reconcile How could he work for either sex?

Old Aristotle with Gassendus, His clothes, as atoms might prevail,

How many would admire our toil ! Might fit a pismire, or a whale.

And yet how few would comprehend us : No, no: he views with studious pleasure

“Here, Richard, let my scheme commence, Your shape, before he takes your measure. Oh! may my words be lost in sense! For real Kate he made the bodice,

While pleas'd Thalia deigns to write And not for an ideal goddess.

The slips and bounds of Alma's flight. No error near his shop-board lurk'd ;

“My simple system shall suppose He knew the folks for whom he work'd:

That Alma enters at the toes;

That then she mounts by just degrees
Up to the ancles, legs, and knees;
Next, as the sap of life does rise,
She lends her vigor to the thighs;
And all these under-regions past,
She nestles somewhere near the waist;
Gives pain or pleasure, grief or laughter,
As we shall show at large hereafter.
Mature, if not improv'd by time,
Up to the heart she loves to climb;
From thence, compellid by craft and age,
She makes the head her latest stage.

“From the feet upward to the head”.
“ Pithy and short,” says Dick,“ proceed.”
“ Dick, this is not an idle notion :
Observe the progress of the motion.
First, I demonstratively prove,
That feet were only made to move;
And legs desire to come and go,
For they have nothing else to do.

“Hence, long before the child can crawl,
He learns to kick, and wince, and sprawl:
To hinder which, your midwife knows
To bind those parts extremely close ;
Lest Alma, newly enter'd in,
And stunn'd at her own christening's din.
Fearful of future grief and pain,
Should silently sneak out again.
Full piteous seems young Alma's case ;
As in a luckless gamester's place,
She would not play, yet must not pass.

“ Again; as she grows something stronger,
And master's feet are swath'd no longer,
If in the night too oft he kicks,
Or shows his locomotive tricks;
These first assaults fat Kate repays him;
When half asleep, she overlays him.

“ Now mark, dear Richard, from the age
That children tread this worldly stage,
Broom-staff or poker they bestride,
And round the parlor love to ride ;
Till thoughtful father's pious care
Provides his brood, next Smithfield Fair,
With supplemental hobby-horses :
And happy be their infant courses !

"Hence for some years they ne'er stand still:
Their legs, you see, direct their will;
From opening morn till setting sun,
Around the fields and woods they run;
They frisk, and dance, and leap, and play,
Nor heed what Freind or Snape can say.

“To her next stage as Alma flies,
And likes, as I have said, the thighs,
With sympathetic power she warms
Their good allies and friends, the arms;
While Betty dances on the green,
And Susan is at stool-ball seen;
While John for nine-pins does declare,
And Roger loves to pitch the bar:
Both legs and arms spontaneous move;
Which was the thing I meant to prove.

" Another motion now she makes :
O, need I name the seat she takes?
His thought quite chang’d the stripling finds ;
The sport and race no more he minds ;
Neglected Tray and pointer lie,
And covies unmolested fly.
Sudden the jocund plain he leaves,
And for the nymph in secret grieves.

In dying accents he complains
Of cruel fires, and raging pains.
The nymph too longs to be alone,
Leaves all the swains, and sighs for one.
The nymph is warm’d with young desire,
And feels, and dies to quench his fire.
They meet each evening in the grove;
Their parley but augments their love:
So to the priest their case they tell :
He ties the knot; and all goes well.

“But, O my Muse, just distance keep;
Thou art a maid, and must not peep.
In ninc months' time, the bodice loose,
And petticoats too short, disclose
That at this age the active mind
About the waist lies most confin'd;
And that young life and quickening sense
Spring from his influence darted thence
So from the middle of the world
The Sun's prolific rays are hurld :
'Tis from that seat he darts those beams,
Which quicken Earth with genial flames."

Dick, who thus long had passive sat,
Here strok'd his chin, and cock'd his hat;
Then slapp'd his hand upon the board,
And thus the youth put in his word.
“ Love's advocates, sweet sir, would find him
A higher place than you assign’d him.”

“ Love's advocates! Dick, who are those ?"“The poets, you may well suppose. I'm sorry, sir, you have discarded The men with whom till now you herded. Prose-men alone, for private ends, I thought, forsook their ancient friends. In cor stillavit, cries Lucretius; If he may be allow'd to teach us. The self-same thing soft Ovid says, (A proper judge in such a case,) Horace's phrase is, lorrel jecur ; And happy was that curious speaker. Here Virgil too has plac'd this passion. What signifies too long quotation ? In ode and epic, plain the case is, That Love holds one of these two places,"

“Dick, without passion or reflection, I'll straight demolish this objection.

“First, poets, all the world agrees,
Write half to profit, half 10 please.
Matter and figure they produce;
For garnish this, and that for use :
And in the structure of their feasts,
They seek to feed and please their guests :
But one may balk this good intent,
And take things otherwise than meant.
Thus, if you dine with my lord-mayor,
Roast beef and venison is your fare;
Thence you proceed to swan and bustard,
And persevere in tart and custard :
But tulip-leaves and lemon-peel
Help only to adorn the meal;
And painted flags, superb and neat,
Proclaim you welcome to the treat.
The man of sense his meat devours,
But only smells the peel and flowers;
And he must be an idle dreamer,
Who leaves the pie, and gnaws the streamer

“ That Cupid goes with bow and arrows,
And Venus keeps her coach and sparrows,
Is all but emblem, to acquaint one,
The son is sharp, the mother wanton.


Such images have sometimes shown
A mystic sense, but oftener none.
For who conceives, what bards devise,
That Heaven is plac'd in Celia's eyes ;
Or where's the sense, direct and moral,
That teeth are pearl, or lips are coral?

“ Your Horace owns, he various writ,
As wild or sober maggots bit:
And, where too much the poet ranted,
The sage philosopher recanted.
His grave Epistles may disprove
The wanton Odes he made to Love.

“ Lucretius keeps a mighty pother
With Cupid and his fancied mother;
Calls her great queen of Earth and Air,
Declares that winds and seas obey her;
And, while her honor he rehearses,
Implores her to inspire his verses.

“ Yet, free from this poetic madness,
Next page he says, in sober sadness,
That she and all her fellow-gods
Sit idling in their high abodes,
Regardless of this world below,
Our health or hanging, weal or woe;
Nor once disturb their heavenly spirits
With Scapin's cheats, or Csesar's merits.

“ Nor e'er can Latin poets prove
Where lies the real seat of Love.
Jecur they burn, and cor they pierce,
As either best supplies their verse;
And, if folks ask the reason for't,
Say, one was long, and t’other short.
Thus, I presume, the British Muse
May take the freedom strangers use.
In prose our property is greater :
Why should it then be less in metre?
If Cupid throws a single dart,
We make him wound the lover's heart :
But, if he takes his bow and quiver,
'Tis sure he must transfix the liver :
For rhyme with reason may dispense,
And sound has right to govern sense.

" But let your friends in verse suppose,
What ne'er shall be allow'd in prose;
Anatomists can make it clear,
The Liver minds his own affair;
Kindly supplies our public uses,
And parts and strains the vital juices;
Still lays some useful bile aside,
To tinge the chyle's insipid tide :
Else we should want both gibe and satire ;
And all be burst with pure good-nature.
Now gall is bitter with a witness,
And love is all delight and sweetness.
My logic then has lost its aim,
If sweet and bitter be the same :
And he, methinks, is no great scholar,
Who can mistake desire for choler.

“ The like may of the heart be said; Courage and terror there are bred. All those, whose hearts are loose and low, Start, if they hear but the tattoo : And mighty physical their fear is; For, soon as noise of combat near is, Their heart, descending to their breeches, Must give their stomach cruel twitches. But heroes, who o'ercome or die, Have their hearts hung extremely high, The strings of which, in battle's heat, Against their very corslets beat;

Keep time with their own trumpet's measnre, And yield them most excessive pleasure.

“Now, if 'tis chiefly in the heart
That Courage does itself exert,
'Twill be prodigious hard to prove
That this is eke the throne of Love.
Would Nature make one place the seat
Of fond desire, and fell debate ?
Must people only take delight in
Those hours, when they are tir'd of fighting?
And has no man, but who has kill'd
A father, right to get a child ?
These notions then I think but idle ;
And Love shall still possess the middle.

“This truth more plainly to discover,
Suppose your hero were a lover.
Though he before had gall and rage,
Which death or conquest must assuage,
He grows dispirited and low;
He hates the fight, and shuns the foe.

“In scornful sloth Achilles slept,
And for his wench, like Tall-boy, wept.
Nor would return to war and slaughter,
Till they brought back the parson's daughter.

“ Antonius fled from Actium's coast,
Augustus pressing, Asia lost :
His sails by Cupid's hands unfurl'd,
To keep the fair, he gave the world.
Edward our Fourth, rever'd and crown'd,
Vigorous in youth, in arms renown'd,
While England's voice, and Warwick's care,
Design'd him Gallia's beauteous heir,
Chang'd peace and power for rage and wars,
Only to dry one widow's tears—

"France's fourth Henry we may see
A servant to the fair d'Estree;
When, quitting Coutras' prosperous field,
And Fortune taught at length to yield,
He from his guards and midnight tent
Disguis'd o'er hills and valleys went,
To wanton with the sprightly dame,
And in his pleasure lost his fame.

“ Bold is the critic who dares prove
These heroes were no friends to love;
And bolder he, who dares aver
That they were enemies to war.
Yet, when their thought should, now or never
Have rais'd their heart, or fir'd their liver,
Fond Alma to those parts was gone,
Which Love more justly calls his own.

“Examples I could cite you more; But be contented with these four: For when one's proofs are aptly chosen, Four are as valid as four dozen. One came from Greece, and one from Rome; The other two grew nearer home. For some in ancient books delight; Others prefer what moderns write: Now I should be extremely loth, Not to be thought expert in both.”

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Canto II.

“But shall we take the Muse abroad To drop her idly on the road ? And leave our subject in the middle, As Butler did his Bear and Fiddle ? Yet he, consummate master, knew, When to recede, and where pursue.

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