This gnaws his handkerchief, while that
Gives the kind ogling nymph his hat;
Here one in love with choiristers
Minds singing more than law affairs.
A sergeant limping on behind,
Shows justice lame as well as blind.
To gain new clients some dispute,
Others protract an ancient suit.
Jargon and noise alone prevail,
While sense and reason's sure to fail.
At Babel thus law terms began,

And now at Westmer go on."

The occupations of First Term Day are further described in the following, by John Baynes, a lawyer, who lived in the latter half of the last century: the names all represent real persons :

OF JUSTIFYING BAIL.

"Baldwin. Hewett, call Taylor's bail — for I

Shall now proceed to justify.

Where's Taylor's bail?

Hewett. 1st Bail.

I can't get in.

Austen.

Silence - and if your lordship crave it,
Austen shall read our affidavit.
Will Priddle, late of Fleet Street, gent,
Makes oath and saith, that late he went
To Duke's place, as he was directed,
By notice, and he there expected

Mingay.

No affidavit can be fuller.

Well, friend, you've heard this affidavit:

2d Bail. Mingay.

2d Bail. Mingay.

2d Bail. Mingay.

2d Bail.

Mingay.

What is your trade?

A scavenger.

And pray, sir, were you never found
Bankrupt?

I'm worth a thousand pound.

A thousand pound, friend-boldly said -
In what consisting?

Willes.
Mingay.

Ist Bail.

Mingay.

Reject him.

Well, friend, now tell me where you dwell?

Sir, I have lived in Clerkenwell

These ten years.

Half a guinea dead. (Aside.)

My lords, if you've the notice read,
It says Duke's place. So I desire
A little further time to inquire.

Baldwin. Why, Mr. Mingay, all this vapor?

Willes.

Take till to-morrow.

Lord Mansfield.

Call the paper."

"POOR ROBIN,"

whoever he may be, has his fling at the lawyers:

"This day the long vacation o'er,

And lawyers go to work once more,
With their materials all provided,
That they may have the cause decided.
The plaintiff he brings in his bill;
He'll have his cause, cost what it will:
Till afterward comes the defendant,
And is resolved to make an end on't;
And having got all things in fitness,
Supplied with money and with witness;
And makes a noble, bold defense,
Backed with material evidence.
The proverb is, one cause is good
Until the other's understood.
They thunder out to little purpose,
With certiorari, habeas corpus,
Their replicandos, writs of error,
To fill the people's hearts with terror.
And if the lawyers do approve it,
To chancery they must remove it;

And then the two that were so warm
Must leave it to another term:

Till they go home and work for more,
To spend as they have done before."

Many legal odes have been written, but none better than this: "To a Sparrow alighting before the Judges' Chambers in Serjeants' Inn, Fleet street. Written in half an hour, while attending a summons:

"Art thou solicitor for all thy tribe,

That thus I now behold thee?

one that comes

Down amid bail-above, an under scribe,
To sue for crumbs? -

Away! 'tis vain to ogle round the square, —

I fear thou hast no head

To think to get thy bread

Where lawyers are!

Say-hast thou pulled some sparrow o'er the coals,
And flitted here a summons to indite?

I only hope no cursed judicial kite

Has struck thee off the rolls!

I scarce should dream thee of the law-and yet
Thine eye is keen and quick enough- and still
Thou bear'st thyself with perk and tiny fret:
But then how desperately short thy bill!
How quickly might'st thou be of that bereft! -
A sixth 'taxed off'- how little would be left!

Art thou on summons come, or order bent?

Tell me, for I am sick at heart to know.

Say in the sky is there 'distress for rent,'

That thou hast flitted to the courts below?
If thou wouldst haul some sparrow o'er the coals,
And wouldst his spirit hamper and perplex-

Go to John Body—he's available—
Sign, swear, and get a bill of Middlesex.
Returnable (mind—bailable!)

On Wednesday after th' morrow of All Souls.

Or dost thou come a sufferer? I see

I see thee 'cast thy bail-ful eyes around.'
Oh! call James White, and he will set thee free.
He and John Baines will speedily be bound
In double the sum

That thou wilt come,

And meet the plaintiff Bird on legal ground.
But stand-oh, stand aside! - for look,
Judge Best, on no fantastic toe,

Through dingy arch-by dirty nook-
Across the yard into his room doth go; —
And wisely there doth read
Summons for time to plead,
And frame

Order for same.

Thou twittering, legal, foolish, feather'd thing,
A tiny boy, with salt for latitat,

Is sneaking, bailiff-like, to touch thy wing;-
Canst thou not see the trick he would be at?
Away, away! and let him not prevail.

I do rejoice thou'rt off, and yet I groan

To read in that boy's silly fate my own:

I am at fault,

For from my attic though I brought my salt,

I've failed to put a little on thy tale!"

The next two are from Cruikshank's Comic Alma

nacs