For Britain has but little chance
To vie in outward show with France!
There folemn Pomp took lofty strides,
Attended by her gaudy train;

There Laughter fhook her muddy fides, And Frolic frisk'd along the plain.

The goddess Pleasure there delights to rove, 'Midit military pomp, or fofter fcenes of love.

IX.

Fame in her cloudy chariot flew

From place to place, each scene to view;
But when the Gallic pomp she saw,
She foon condemn'd the London show:
Then to her wide-extended lips
She put the trump that founds fo loud,
But Britain's Genius flyly flips
Close to her from the gazing crowd,
And, unperceiv'd, with gentle thump,
He put afide the ready trump.

X.

In t'other hand he held a cup,
Which Jove himself might fnuffle up;
'Twas what you may a cenfer call,
Full of fweet incenfe from Guildhall;
Where many a fatten'd beast and fowl
Were just prepar'd for facrificing,

With many a fparkling, flowing bowl:
A fight fo lufcious and enticing,
No fooner met the eye of Fame,
Than thither with full fpeed fhe came.

XI.

So bufy had the Goddels been, It made her appetite quite keen; She fnuffled quick the fav'ry fmell, Which pleas'd her Goddefs-fhip fo well, That now Sir John had nought to do To win the great and glorious day, But leave to France all pompous fhow, And feek for fame this better way. This faw the Gallic Knight, too late, And chew'd the cud of empty state..

XII.

When cheerful fongs and feftive glee
Gave place to noify jollity,

When Cits lay welt'ring in red Port,
Fame, much delighted with the fport,
Took kindly by the hand our Roight,
And by the great Olympus iwore
He thould find favour in her fight:
Thus he the palm of vict'ry bore!
"Subftantial food," faid fhe,

is now, I know; Far pref'rable to vain and empty show."

Nov. 10, 1801.

BARDD CLOFF.

LORD MAYOR'S DAY;

OR AN ODE TO GLUTTONY.

[From the Oracle.]

INSATIATE monfter! born and bred
Where fell Difeafe erects its head,
And ghaftly fpectre's pine;

The throbbing pulfe, the burning veins,
The gout's tormenting, racking pains,
Gluttony! these are thine.

When man, illum'd by Reason's ray,
Dares fuch degrading mind'display,
Say, fhall the Mufe be mute;
When, 'ftead of foaring to the fkies,
Reeling and gorg'd'on earth he lies,
And imitates the brute ?

Th' infpiring glafs, the gen'rous bowl,
May footh each care, and cheer the foul-
The heart of forrow cheat;
Quick make the hours pais along
Promote the laugh, excite the fong,
To measures move the feet.

But Gluttony, voracious fiend,
Leaves every focial joy behind;
Dull, heavy, felfish, cold!
In Hift'ry's true, impartial page,
To each fucceeding wond'ring age,
What horrid tales are told!

Ma

"THERE CANNOT BE WAR WITHOUT PEOPLE"

A

CELEBRATED SPEECH IN A CERTAIN ASSEMBLY, IN THE DEBATE ON THE ARMY ESTIMATES, NÓV. 1801.

WHAT acceffions to knowledge this age brings to light! "There cannot be war without people to fight."

So R-bf-n harangued— Sapientum Octavus-
And more information as pertinent gave us.
Yet Homer, as well as our politic Don,
Held foldiers of warfare the fine quá non.

Of Therfilochus, Glaucus, and Medon, you've read,
Who right valiantly march'd to be knock'd on the head,
And Falstaff maintain'd that in battle 't was fit,
Mortal men fhould be furnislı'd' to fill up a pit *.
Cries Wm, "Fight on, for, though peacemakers fcoff,
I'll be worn we have plenty of men to kill off."
And if fuch be the doginas of R-bf-n ́and W
And Homer and Falstaff, fay who shall refcind 'em?«
Yet without an exception few rules we have known,
And R-bf-n's harangue gives the lie to his own.
Ye heroes courageous take pattern by him,

And warfare you'll wage; yet 'icape found wind and limb!
With one flafh of his wit, with one dath of his pen,
He shall fhew you the way, Sirs, to war without men.
'Gainst the Frenchmen or Dons,when your musket you level,
An uncourteous retort fends you poft to the devil:
But you 'll waste neither gunpowder, blood, nor expenfe,
If you'll wage war, like R-bfn, against Common Senfe.

SIR,

DISSOLUTION OF PARLIAMENT.

[From the Morning Chronicle.]

ALTHOUGH I have little reafon to expect that you

will foon be able to fpare a corner for this letter, from the more preffing occurrence of this memorable week, I hope you will find fome opportunity to throw

Food for powder-they'll fill a pit as well as better; tufh, man! mortal men, mortal men. Falstaff, ft Part of Henry the IVth.

it in the way of the Prime Minifter. I fhould not have ventured to addrefs him, had I not observed that he feems very open to advice from whatever quarter, and that he is at prefent deferted by many of his former competitors.

It is reported that a diffolution of Parliament is in agitation; and, if I am not mifinformed, the measure will take place after the enfuing recefs. Permit me to affure the Minifter, that if he had not more reasons for adopting this measure than have yet appeared, he could not have chofen a worse time. As a Member of Parliament, I feel the embarraffment I fhall be fubjected to already, and I know that many of my brethren are nonplussed in the fame degree.

The fact is, Sir, and it is not worth while to conceal it, on a diffolution of Parliament, when we come to look our conftituents in the face, they have always fomething to expect, and we fomething to promife. I do not allude to the vulgarity of bribery. No man can believe that any fuch thing is practifed. But I allude to thofe various matters of national or individual improvement, which we are frequently pledged to fupport, in cafe we have the honour to be elected. Your readers may remember a confiderable number of fuch promifes and pledges at the last election, and how faithfully they have been kept all the world knows.

Now, Sir, in the exifting circumftances wherein the nation is placed, what have we to promife? We cannot promife to put a speedy iffue to the calamities of war

That is all over. We cannot lament over the fcarcity of corn, and the infelicity of the harveft-That is what no man will believe. A very few months ago a man might have canvaffed a parish with a leg of mutton, or procured a pot-wallopper who would have fold his birthright for a quartern-loaf. Now all is comparative plenty, and the "greafy rogues" will

have

have the ill manners to talk to us with their mouths full. What, likewife, can we do for the younger branches? The army and navy are fhut against commiffions and preferments. No man can canvafs with the temptation of half-pay. The excife and cuftoms 'are, full; and it will require no small skill in us to conjure up fome complaints which we may have the credit of promifing to redrefs.

Then, Sir, as to the line of politics, how are we defeated! In fuch a confufion of parties, to whom or to what can we pledge ourselves? How can we explain to common-fenfe men, the new arrangement of ins that are hardly in, and outs that will never be out?" Give me another world to put my foot on," faid the philofopher, "and I will move this on which we stand.”—Give me, I fay, a bit of political ground to stand upon, and I will yet move a corporation.or a borough. But really, one knows not what to do. It is all narth underneath; and until there is a little more draining, we can build nothing folid or permanent. I remember when a man was asked whether he was a Tory or a Whig, a Pittite or a Foxite; there was fome fenfe in that; we knew what we were about; but now that the main armies are broke down into independent corps, and each has its own difcipline, we know not how to handle our votes, fhoulder our confciences, or where to look for the word of command.

This, Sir, is our own woful predicament. - The people wanted peace, and they have got it-They cried for plenty, and it is coming upon them. What can we offer, or how will it look for a man who could carry a budget of pledges to his conftituents, to have nothing better in his gift than the mending of a road and repairing of a bridge, or perhaps furnishing the town-hall with a new clock?

I am, Sir, yours, &c.

M. P.

A NEW