I fhall clofe with the admirable advice which Wolfey gives to Cromwell, and which I forefee you will confider as your motto:

"Love thyself last;-cherish those hearts that hate thee: Corruption wins not more than honesty.

Still in thy right hand carry gentle peace,

To filence envious tongues. Be just, and fear not.
Let all the ends thou aim'ft at, be thy country's,
Thy God's, and truth's :-then if thou fall'ft,
Thou fall' a blessed martyr.”

MERLIN.

BARONETS BADGED, or, THE HELMET AND BLOODY HAND:

A FARCE PERFORMED AT CUMBERLAND

HOUSE FETE,

To all this gallant company, good humour, mirth, and

greeting.

Behold! two noble characters attend this merry meetingMake room! and fhould you want to know who are these curious elves,

Be filent, ladies, if you can, whilst they explain themselves. Explanation, explanation, &c

IST BARONET.

Sir Booby Badge, a baronet, I am, 't is what I boast in,
Of the laft batch, fresh from the oven, Smoking hot and

roafting.

2D BARONET.

No mushroom I, Sir Title Type, whofe ancestors, 't is

known,

Two centries back with eight-pence bought that honour Speculation, fpeculation, &c.

of the Crown.

IST BARONET.

From Avon's claffic banks we come, where late by gout

infected,

Our noddles, whilst the fit was on, a precious plan pro

jected;

T was ours the glorious fcheme to frame, in folemn con

sultation,

To make ourselves notoriously the eye-traps of the nation. Confultation, confultation, &c.

2D BARONET.

And therefore we are come to town, and take the tafk upon

us,

To barter with the Throne again for more confpicuous honours ;

In fhort, to get a patent grant, to drefs with fign or token, Which may denote us baronets, as plain as if 't were fpoken. Denotation, denotation, &c.

IST BARONET.

For fure fome badge we fhould not want, our rank in life

that tells,

When every fool's head is affign'd its proper cap and bells;
Such as our crested banner bears, by way of advertisement,
To fignify" what's in the wind," without the least dif-
guisement.
Badgeration, badgeration, &c.

2D BARONET.

The helmet and the bloody hand in vain our arms may

boast of,

If these heraldic ornaments we cannot make the most of; For never till the fame fhall grace the owner's head and

back,

By instinct will Sir John be known from any fimple Jack.

Regulation, regulation, &c.

IST BARONET.

To be, or not to be, a baroner's the question;

To leave no room, as heretofore, for doubt and falfe fuggeftion;

Who would not fardels bear, when fuch appropriate bearing Would defignate the inward man, and fet the world a-ftaring? Defignation, defignation, &c.

2D BARONET.

In this good work of lawful pride, 't is plain we are no flatterns,

Drefs'd cap-a-pee of our defign experimental patterns:
Ye lift'ning baronets around, of old and new creation,
Support our well-meant efforts with your kindeft approba-
Approbation, approbation, &c.

tion.

1ST BARONET.

Under the mask we cannot fail fresh profelytes to gain,
And if the project here fucceeds we shall be really vain.
Sham baronets the world may cheat in fwindling combina

tion,

Ours is a bona fide plot, and worthy imitation.

Imitation, imitation, &c.

IN

THE BADGE OF HONOUR;

OR, TITLE MADE NOTORIOUS.

N this age of improvement, when every degree
Wears lome badge of diftinction for people to fee;
How cruel that we, when for company drefs'd,
Shou'd n't fport fome infignia as well as the rest!

Derry down, &c.
Cats of arms and fine crefts are profufely allow'd,
To mark those knights and fquires from the rest of the

crowd;

Yet that we are denied 'em you 'll all understand,
When I tell you our arms are confin'd to a hand.
Derry down, &'c.

On the Thames every fellow that rows in a boat,
May wear a large badge on the fleeve of his coat;
And if knights of the river thus blazon their fame,
Pray why fhou'd n't Knights of the Bath do the fame ?
Derry doron, &c.

Chimney-fweepers have Parliament fauctions to clap
A fine plate of brafs on the front of their cap,
While we must contented fit down in our places,
Without any more braís than belongs to our faces.
Derry down, &c.

Our

Our ancestor knights were content to be known
By their deeds in the field and their laurels full grown;
On diftinctions like thefe Fame her praises may wafte,
But fuch obfolete honours are not to our taste.

Derry down, &c.

Then join our petition, fince we no more crave
Than privilege equal to what others have;
Since the world is all folly, we've only a mind
To be thought as great fools as the reft of mankind.

Derry down, &c..

A RECEIPT TO MAKE A PERFECT BEAUTY.." [From the Morning Poft.];

*

TAKE, Townshend's brow, ferene and fair;
Rutland's bright eyes and auburn hair;
Monk's nofe and mouth, of pureft Grecian make;
Roles and lilies from fweet Gardner § take;
Throgmortoni fhall her lovely fhape refign,
Form'd by the Graces with an art divine;
Fair Devon's fmile fhall animate the whole,
And prove my fair-one to poffefs a foul;

*.

With Hertford's ftep then graceful let her move,
And all muft own the beauteous Queen of Love.

MR. EDITOR,

A GENERAL ADMIRER

FUMIGATION.

[From the Morning Chronicle.]

EVERY nian of fcience muft rejoice, that the pa triotic difcovery of Dr. Carmichael Smyth has been rewarded in a manner fuitable to the dignity of Parliament; and I hope the ingenious difcoverer of the mode of expelling corruption and corrupted air from

Marchionefs Townfhend.
Lady E izabeth Monk.
Lady Throgmorton.
*+ Marchionefs of Hertford.

+ Dowager Dutches Rutland.
Hon Mrs. Gardne
Dutchess of Devonshire.

N 5

hips

fhips and houses, will make a fpeedy trial of its efficacy on a large building which I beg leave to point out, near Palace Yard. It was formerly ufed as a chapel, and divine fervice was for many years performed in it; but of late it has been ufed for very different purpofes, and within the laft fix years must have abounded in that fpecies of mephitic air which is moft pernicious to the Conftitution.

This noxious air is, I am told, principally occafioned by experiments frequently made on the malleability and ductility of the precious metals, as gold and filver; and it is quite unneceffary to add, that metallic effluvia are of all others the most pernicious, and produce very extraordinary effects on the lungs of fome perfons, while, in the cafe of others, they are faid to take away all power of fpeech, leaving to the unhappy patients little elfe than the power of nodding affent to what another Lays.

This noxious gas is the more hurtful, Sir, as its effects are not confined to the place in which it is generated, but fpread over the whole country (fuch is the nature of infection), and has even been known to affect other countries, being carried there on board of fhip in bales of loans, fubfidies, and other articles peculiar to English manufacture.

I am the more defirous of pointing out this matter to my worthy friend Dr. Smyth, because the premises 1 fpeak of are now empty, the proprietor having determined on certain repairs, and particularly having iffued orders for a new fet of furniture. And the fumigation will be the more neceffary, because, however defirous the worthy proprietor is that his furniture fhould be regularly changed once in fix or feven years, fuch is the roguifhnefs of our cabinet-makers, that they frequently fend back the fame articles, only varnished over, with new braffes and handles, &c..

I am, Sir, your humble fervant,

July 1.

CHEMICUS.

THE