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dation bills, a balloon. A mushroom would be probably adopted generally by the new country bankers.

DIARY

OF A TRIP TO WEYMOUTH, WRITTEN BY A WELL-KNOWN CONVIVIAL, GOOD-HUMOURED, AND punning

ALDERMAN,

[From the Oracle.]

Of all the jovial wits, most certes,
None can compare with red-nos'd

ANON.

TUESDAY night fupped at Wiltshire's.-Drank "A speedy Peace and Joon," because of the late happy event.-Ate four dozen oysters, drank nine glaffes of brandy and water, and having ordered the waiter to call me at eight in the morning, went to bed.-Mem. Sent the chambermaid to pot! Got up next morning, and, having told the Poftboy he was like the Ministry, because he had the whip-band of thofe under him, drove to Bagfhot to breakfast, where, with a bon-appetir (Bonaparte), I played the part of the Mafter of the Rolls. Mem. Bagfhot famous for mutton; inhabitants, of courfe, sheepish.-After breakfaft wrote a letter to the Banking-houfe, faying that I thought the Clerks fhould have more falary, as they had fo much walking on their hands.-Lunched at Hartford Bridge, where I was d-d eafy with the landlord Nick Demezey. Between Murrell Green and Basingstoke obferved fome pretty little houfes, which I thought would do very well for a fingle man and his wife.-Got to Salisbury, and found I was where I fet out, in Wiltshire.Arrived at Blandford; thought of nothing elfe but the mighty man of Parmesan cheese.On the other fide of Blandford, about two miles, my water-proof coat got wet through; with it had been wine In wino weritas."Aldermen fhould always fhew their learning. Dined at Dorchefter; after dinner read the newspaper. Theatrical

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Theatrical news-nothing but the Rival TragediansCan't for the life of me tell which of the two C's is the beft actor," Cooke or Kemble!"-Arrived at Weymouth the night of the illuminations; and the people fwore the chaife was on fire, merely because I exhibited my nose at the window-Wanted fupper, and ordered the waiter only to bring it in, as I could find the Way(to) mouth.

Rofe at eight, and bathed-Told the bathing-woman fhe was as handfome as Neptune, becaufe fhe lived in the fea-Whilft I was in the fea, thought my figure would form a prominent feature in a landfkip-Breakfafted-made the waiter laugh when he brought in the eggs, by telling him, from Joe Miller, he was a very felfish fellow. Read the news-Legge the Chelsea Penfioner hung-Mem. Put his foot in it.-Good pun for the clubs.-Shaved, and told the barber not to lather me, or I'd give him a dreffing.-After breakfast walked on the beach; and whilft I was reading fome papers, was arrefted for a Spy, and very nearly committed, because the papers were fuppofed to be feditious, on account of their being illegible; but was liberated, on explaining that they were only a Collection of my Puns-Told the ftory to fome ladies, which like Oroonoko," they did moft feriously decline."-Walked afterwards with Mrs. Whale, the blubber-merchant's wife, and gallantly wifhed that I were Jonas.-Strolled over to the Ifle of Portland, and as I entered a PublicHoufe, fancied myfelf a member of the Privy-Council. Told Stacie (who has quitted the Bedford Arms, Covent Garden), I was forry he had left his head behind him. -Dined; and having ate my fill of apple-pie, fancied myfelf a jack with pa udding in my belly-Read the papers-Some impudent dog been writing my Diary in the Oracle.-N. B. Thresh him till he's a man of ftraw. Went to the Theatre-Mrs. Brimftone and Mr. Flash offended, becaufe I told them they played

Romeo

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Romeo and Juliet like thunder and lightning.-N. B. To thew my learning, tell the club that the play of Romeo and Juliet was written by an Apothecary, who in the Strand, or "thereabouts does dwell !"-Drank eleven glaffes of brandy and water, and went to bed. -Meni. Frightened three ladies into hyfterics, and made two mifcarry, by an alarm of fire; when it appeared that it was only the rubicundity of my face, going up in the dusk, which caufed one of the fair ones to exclaim

"What gave you that jolly red nose ?”

Told the Waiter, Dafh my buttons, as you're a good fellow, you fhall have my old hoes.-Paid my lodgings at a Watchmaker's; though, by the by, I ought o have gone on tick.-Told Mr. Apewell, the Mimic, that I was the best imitator, as I should take myself off -Difcharged my fubfeription at the Library," All for Love."-Mem. The best part of the book to read is the outfide.-Got into the chaife at fix in the morning, and feeling myself rather queer, took fonie rum and water. Being rather ailing, had a toaft and tankard Lat. Dorchefter.-Went on to Salisbury, and was determined to afpire to the top of the Cathedral.--Dined at Basingstoke, and being rather impetuous, was refolved to have a rafher on the coals-read the newspapers, and obferved that next Tuesday, owing to the Ruffian debate, there will be a fevere Bear baiting in the House of Commons.-Mem. After dinner had fome olives, on account of the peace, though, like many others, made wry faces in Swallowing.-Made a point of drinking no more than a pint of wine; and having told Mrs. Widgron, the miftrefs of the houfe, that by her bill L fhould have conceived her to be a wild duck, ordered the boy to drive to Murrell Green, where I looked confounded blue, on being informed that there was no other milk in the house except cream.-Came on to Hounslow, and my coat being very much splashed, was D 6

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told by the landlord he knew I had been at Egham, as he perceived by my coat I had been through Staines.Mem. Good for the city, though fear they won't take it.-Arrived at Turnham Green, and remembered the old story, that Hammersmith was the way to make peas yellow.-Drank tea at Kensington.-Thought of the 9th of November.-Hope the Lord Mayor may prove the better borje.-Glorious feafting on Monday. Warm work among the waiters.-Suppofe they'll run for a heat inftead of a plate.-Mem. To look over all my puns and fentiments, and furbish them up against the occafion.-Saw a good pun in the Oracle.

A gentleman never been at Cork, but feen many drawings of it. N. B. Improve upon it, by fubftituting Paintings for Drawings.-Met with a friend, who took me down to Hampton a-fishing-Arrived at the Bell, where I told the landlord to hold his clapper.— Ordered a beef-fteak, and told the waiter my chops were ready when his were.-Went to bed, and hearing the Abigail fing, told her, I fuppofed she was an Abbey-girl. -Fifhed in the morning; but as it rained very hard, got under Moulsey Bridge, for I knew the fif would come there to get out of the wet-Returned to town in the evening much improved in health, accuracy, puns, and erudition.

(The End of my Diary.)

SKETCH AT BRIGHTON.

[From the fame.]

THE morning is generally paffed by perfons of rank. in equeftrian excurfions to Rotten Dean, a fmall village four miles diftant, where there are bathingmachines; but a most forbidding want of fociety and neceffaries prompts the rambler to return to the more accommodating town. Curious perfons, who wish to explore the rural scenery of Suffex, may find a great

variety

'rariety in the ride to Prefton, or over the Down to Devil's Dyke; where the adventurous horfeman may practife according to the directions given by GAMBADO, and overleap the bounds neck or nothing.

Gentlemen who wish to diftinguish themselves in the elegant fcience of driving, may have curricle-races fimilar to the chariot-races mentioned by Homer, whofe defeription of that game is extremely applicable to the glorious fcenes exhibited along the fhore near this town:

"The fmoking chariots, rapid as they bound,
Now fem to touch the fky, and now the ground:
Thick, where they drive, the duffy clouds arife,
And the loft courfer in the whirlwind flies:
While, hot for fame, and conqueft all his care,
Each o'er his flying courfer bung in air,
Erect with ardour, pois'd upon the rein,

They pant, they retch, and fhout along the plain."

Such are the generous competitions of our young mobility and gentry at this fashionable place; and in many refpects they evince more intrepidity and dexterity than the charioteers of Greece.

The Grecians had emolument in view to ftimulate their exertions; their chariots were ftrong, and not liable to be readily overturned; but our more illuftrious British heroes venture their necks purely for the benour, or rather the fun of the thing. Nothing is more common than to fee their curricles overturned and dafbed to pieces, while the horfes and rider roll along according to the philofophical principles of motion; and afterwards get up, if no bones are broken, and return to town with all imaginable magnanimity!

Gentlemen who choose to exercife their muscular powers as watermen, daily give proofs of their fearless difpofition by rowing the pleafure-boats, while their lovely female friends fit in ftate, beautiful as Cleo

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