(p) Ay, paint our swarthy billions Ere two well-led cotillions Have danced themselves away. TURKISH PATROL, as able and intelligent Investigators wind down the Himalayas: What is the state of the Nation? What is its occupation? Hi! get along, get along, get along-lend us the information! (dim.) Census the byle1 and the yabu-capture a first-class Babu, Set him to file Gazetteers-Gazetteers (f) What is the state of the Nation, etc., etc. INTERLUDE, from Nowhere in Particular, to stringed and Oriental instruments. Our cattle reel beneath the yoke they bear- The well is dry beneath the village tree The young wheat withers ere it reach a span, Pray, brothers, pray, but to no earthly King- Look westward-bears the blue no brown cloud-bank? Nay, it is written-wherefore should we fly? On our own field and by our cattle's flank Lie down, lie down to die! 'The ox and the pony. SEMI-CHORUS By the plumed heads of Kings Waving high, Where the tall corn springs O'er the dead. If they rust or rot we die, If they ripen we are fed. Very mighty is the power of our Kings! Triumphal return to Simla of the Investigators, attired after the manner of Dionysus, leading a pet tiger-cub in wreaths of rhubarb-leaves, symbolical of India under medical treatment. They sing: We have seen, we have written-behold it, the proof of our manifold toil! In their hosts they assembled and told it-the tale of the Sons of the Soil. We have said of the Sickness-"Where is it?"-and of Death -"It is far from our ken,"— We have paid a particular visit to the affluent children of men. We have trodden the mart and the well-curb-we have stooped to the bield and the byre; And the King may the forces of Hell curb for the People have all they desire! Castanets and step-dance: Oh, the dom1 and the mag and the thakur and the thag, And the bunnia and the ryot are as happy and as quiet Yes, the jain and the jat in his stucco-fronted hut, And the bounding bazugar, By the favour of the King, are as fat as anything, They are they are they are! A list of various Indian tribes and castes. RECITATIVE, Government of India, with white satin wings and electro-plated harp: How beautiful upon the Mountains-in peace reclining, Thus to be assured that our people are unanimously dining. And though there are places not so blessed as others in natural advantages, which, after all, was only to be expected, Proud and glad are we to congratulate you upon the work you have thus ably effected. (Cres.) How be-ewtiful upon the Mountains! HIRED BAND, brasses only, full chorus:— God bless the Squire And all his rich relations Who teach us poor people And casual starvations, We have, we have, they say we have We have our proper rations! CHORUS OF THE CRYSTALLISED FACTS Before the beginning of years Men with an Estimate Strachey with Muir for leaven, Lytton with locks that fell, Ripon fooling with Heaven, And the bigots took in hand Cess and the falling of rain, In the houses of death and of birth. And Death for a blazing light- That his strength might endure for a span- The Much Administered Man. In the towns of the North and the East, They bade him starve his priest And gave him peace in his ways, Jails and Police to fight, And Right-and Might in the Right. At his heart is his daughter's wedding, THE MARE'S NEST JANE AUSTEN BEECHER STOWE DE ROUSE He smoked cigars, called churches slow, For Belial Machiavelli kept The little fact a secret, and, Though o'er his minor sins she wept, Jane Austen did not understand That Lilly-thirteen-two and bay— Absorbed one-half her husband's pay. She was so good she made him worse (Some women are like this, I think); He taught her parrot how to curse, Her Assam monkey how to drink. He vexed her righteous soul until She went up, and he went down hill. Then came the crisis, strange to say, Brought her-now, had it been a letter Know Jane would just have let it lie— But 'twas a telegram instead, Marked "urgent," and her duty plain To open it. Jane Austen read:"Your Lilly's got a cough again. "Can't understand why she is kept "At your expense." Jane Austen wept. |