At one time he finds fault with the dishes at table; at another, with the choice of my maid-servants; sometimes he is displeased with the trimming of my gown, sometimes with the shape of my cloak, or the figure of my head-dress; and should I chance to give an opinion on any subject which is not perfectly to his mind, he probably looks out of humour at the time, and he is sure to chide me about it when we are by ourselves. It is of no consequence whether I have been right or wrong in any of those particulars. If I say a word in defence of my choice or opinion, it is sure to make matters worse, and I am only called a fool for my pains; or, if I express my wonder that he should give himself uneasiness about such trifles, he answers sullenly, that, to be sure, every thing is a trifle in which I choose to disoblige him. It was but the other day, as we were just going out to dine at a friend's house, he told me my gown was extremely ugly. I answered, his observation surprised me, for it was garnet, and I had taken it off on hearing him say he wondered I never chose one of that colour. Upon this he got into a passion, said it was very odd I should charge my bad taste upon him; he had never made any such observation, for the colour was his aversion. The dispute at last grew so warm, that I threw myself down on a settee, unable to continue it, while he flung out of the room, ordered away the coach from the door, and wrote an apology to his friend for our not waiting upon him. We dined in our different apartments: and though I believe, we were equally sorry for what had passed, and Mr. Gold, when we met at supper, asked iny pardon for having contradicted me so roughly; yet we had not sat half an hour together, when he told me, that, after all, I was certainly mistaken, in saying he had recommended a garnet tòlour; and when I very coolly assured him I was not, he renewɩ ed the dispute with as much keenness as ever. We parted in the same bad humour we had done before dinner, and I have hardly had a pleasant look from him since. In a word, Mr. Gold will allow me to have no mind but his; and, unless I can see with his eyes, hear with his ears, and taste with his palate (none of which I can very easily bring myself to do, as you must know all of them are somewhat particular), I see no prospect of our situation changing for the better; and what makes our present one doubly provoking is, that, but for this unfortunate weakness, Mr. Gold, who is in other respects, a very worthy man, would make one of the best of husbands. Pray tell me, Sir, what I should do in this situation, or take your own way of letting my husband see his weakness, the reformation of which would be the greatest of all earthly blessings to Yours, &c. SUSANNA GOLD. I was thinking how I should answer this letter, or in what way I could be useful to my Corrrespondent, when I received the following, the insertion of which is, I believe, the best reply I can make to it. I SIR, To the AUTHOR of the MIRROR. WAS bred a merchant; by my success in trade I am now in affluent circumstances, and I have reason to think that I am so with an unblemished character. Some years ago, I married the daughter of a respectable citizen, who brought a comfortable ad dition to my fortune; and, as she had been virtuously educated, and seemed chearful and good tempered, as I was myself naturally of a domestic turn, and resolved to make a good husband, I thought we bade fair for being happy in each other. But, though I must do my spouse the justice to say, that she is discreet and prudent, attentive to the affairs of her family, a careful and fond mother to her children, and, in many respects, an affectionate and dutiful wife; yet one foible in her temper destroys the effect of all these good qualities. She is so much attached to her own opinions in every trifle, so impatient of contradiction in them, and withal so ready to dispute mine, that, if I disapprove of her taste or sentiments, in any one particular, or seem dissatisfied, when she disapproves of my taste or sentiments, it is the certain source of a quarrel; and while we perfectly agree as to our general plan of life, and every essential circumstance of our domestic economy, this silly fancy, that I must eat, dress, think, and speak, precisely as she would have me, while she will not accommodate herself to me in the most trifling of these particulars, gives me perpetual uneasiness; and with almost every thing I could wish, a genteel income, a good reputation, promising children, and a virtuous wife, whom I sincerely esteem, I have the mortification to find myself absolutely unhappy. wife's will ap I am sure this foible of my poor pear to you, Mr. MIRROR, in its proper light; your making it appear so to her, may be the means of alleviating our mutual distress; for, to tell you the truth, I believe she is almost as great a sufferer as I hope you will gratify me in this desire ; I am. by doing so you may be of general service, and will particularly oblige Your constant reader, and NATHANIEL GOLD. On comparing these two letters it is evident that, from the want of that complacency mentioned in the beginning of this paper, the very sensibility of temper, and strength of affection, which, under its influence, would have made this good couple happy, has had a quite contrary effect. The source of the disquiet they complain of, is nothing else than the want of that respect for the taste, feelings, and opinions of each other, which constitutes the dispo sition I have recommended above, and which, so far from being inconsistent with a reasonable desire of reforming each other in these particulars, is the most probable means of accomplishing it. Nor is the case of Mr. and Mrs. Gold singular in this respect. By much the greatest part of domestic quarrels originate from the want of this plian cy of disposition, which people seem, very absurdly, to suppose may be dispensed with in trifles. I have known a man who would have parted with half his estate to serve a friend, to whom he would not have yielded a hair's breadth in an argument. But the lesser virtues must be attended to as well as the greater; the manners as well as the duties of They form a sort of Pocket Coin, which, though it does not enter into great and important transactions, is absolutely necessary for common and ordinary intercourse. life. K N° 34. SATURDAY, MAY 22, 1799. In compliance with a promise I made my readers at the close of last Saturday's paper (at least it was that sort of promise which a man keeps when the thing suits his inclination), I proceed to give them an account of that dinner to which my friend Mr. Umphraville and I were invited by his cousin Mr. Bearskin. On our way to the house, I perceived certain symptoms of dissatisfaction, which my friend could not help bringing forth, though he durst not impute them to the right cause, as I have heard of men beating their wives at home, to revenge themselves for the crosses they have met with abroad. He complained of the moistness of the weather, and the dirtiness of the street; was quite fatigued with the length of the way (Mr. Bearskin's house being fashionably eccentric), and almost cursed the taylor for the tightness of a suit of clothes, which he had bespoke on his arrival in town, and had now put on for the first time. His chagrin, I believe, was increased by his having just learned from his lawyer, that the business he came to town about, could not be finished at the time he expected, but would probably last a week longer. When we entered Mr. Bearskin's drawing-room, we found his wife sitting with his three daughters ready to receive us. It was easy to see, by the air of the lady, that she was perfectly mistress of the house, and that her husband was only a secondary |