Page images
PDF
EPUB

N° 51. TUESDAY, JULY 20, 1779.

To the AUTHOR of the MIRROR.

Mr. MIRROR,

I AM the daughter of a gentleman of easy, though moderate fortune. My mother died a few weeks after I was born; and before I could be sensible of the loss, a sister of her's, the widow of an English gentleman, carried me to London, where she resided. As my aunt had no children, I became the chief object of her affections; and her favourite amusement consisted in superintending my education. As I grew up, I was attended by the best masters; and every new accomplishment I acquired, gave fresh pleasure to my kind benefactress. But her own conversation tended more than any thing else to form and to improve my mind. Well acquainted herself with the best authors in the English, French, and Italian languages, she was careful to put into my hands such books as were best calculated to culti vate my understanding, and to regulate my taste.

But, though fond of reading and retirement, my aunt thought it her duty to mingle in society as much as her rank and condition required. Her house was frequented by many persons of both sexes, distinguished for elegance of manners and politeness of conversation. Her tenderness made her desirous to find out companions for me of my own age; and, far from being dissatisfied with our

youthful sallies, she seemed never better pleased than when she could add to our amusement and happi

ness.

In this manner I had passed my time, and had entered my seventeenth year, when my aunt was seized with an indisposition, which alarmed me much, although her physicians assured me it was by no means dangerous. My fears increased, on observing that she herself thought it serious. Her tenderness seemed, if possible, to increase; and, though she was desirous to conceal her apprehensions, I have sometimes, when she imagined I did not observe it, found her eyes fixed on me with a mixture of solicitude and compassion, that never failed to overpower me.

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

me

One day she called me into her closet, and, after embracing me tenderly, My dear Harriet,' said she, it is vain to dissemble longer. I feel my strength decay so fast, that I know we soon must part. As to myself, the approach of death gives little uneasiness; and I thank Almighty God that I can look forward to that awful change without dread, and without anxiety. But when I think, my child, of the condition in which I • shall leave you, my heart swells with anguish !— You know my situation; possessed of no fortune, the little I have saved from my jointure, will be ⚫ altogether inadequate to support you in that society in which you have hitherto lived. When I • look back on my conduct towards you, I am not ⚫sure that it has been altogether prudent. I thought it impossible to bestow too much on your education, or to render you too accomplished. I fondly hoped to live to see you happily established in life, united to a man who could discern your merit, who could put a just value on all your acquirements. These hopes are at an end; all, however,

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

that can now be done I have done.-Here are two papers; by the one you will succeed to the little I shall leave; the other is a letter to your father, in which I have recommended you in the most earnest manner to his protection, and intreated him to come to town as soon as he hears of my ⚫ death, and conduct you to Scotland. He is a man ⚫ of virtue; and I hope you will live happily in his family. One only fear I have, and that proceeds from the extreme sensibility of your mind, and gentleness of your disposition; little formed by nature to struggle with the hardships and the difficulties of life, perhaps the engaging softness of your temper has rather been increased by the edu⚫cation you have received. I trust, however, that your good sense will prevent you from being hurt by any little cross untoward accidents you may ⚫ meet with, and that it will enable you to make the most of that situation in which it may be the will of Heaven to place you.'

[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

To all this I could only answer with my tears; and, during the short time that my aunt survived, she engrossed my attention so entirely, that I never once bestowed a thought on myself. As soon after her death as I could command myself sufficiently, I wrote to my father; and, agreeably to my aunt's instruction, inclosed her letter for him; in consequence of which he came to town in a few weeks. Meeting with a father to whose person I was a perfect stranger, and on whom I was ever after entirely to depend, was to me a most interesting event. My aunt had taught me to entertain for him the highest reverence and respect; but, though I had been in use to write, from time to time, both to him, and to a lady he had married not long after my mother's death, I had never been able to draw either the one or the other into any thing like a regular

correspondence; so that I was equally a stranger to their sentiments and dispositions as to their per

sons.

On my father's arrival, I could not help feeling, that he did not return my fond caresses with that warmth with which I had made my account; and afterwards, it was impossible not to remark, that he was altogether deficient in those common attentions which, in polite society, every woman is accustomed to receive, even from those with whom she is most nearly connected. My aunt had made it a rule to consider her domestics as humble friends, and to treat them as such; but my father addressed them with a roughness of voice and of manner that disgusted them, and was extremely unpleasant to me. I was still more hurt with his minute and anxious inquiries about the fortune my aunt had died possessed of; and, when he found how inconsiderable it was, he swore a great oath, that, if he had thought she was to breed me a fine lady, and leave me a beggar, I never should have entered her house. • But don't cry, Harriet,' added he, it was not your fault ⚫ be a good girl, and you shall never want while I • have.

On our journey to Scotland, I sometimes attempted to amuse my father by engaging him in conversation but I never was lucky enough to hit on any subject on which he wished to talk. After a journey, which many circumstances concurred to render rather unpleasant, we arrived at my father's house. I had been told that it was situated in a remote part of Scotland, and thence I concluded the scene around it to be of that wild romantic kind, of all others the best suited to my inclination. But, instead of the rocks, the woods, the water-falls I had fancied to myself, I found an open, bleak, barren moor, covered with heath, except a few patches round the

house, which my father, by his skill in ägriculture, had brought to bear grass and corn.

My mother-in-law, a good looking woman, about forty, with a countenance that bespoke frankness and good-humour, rather than sensibility or delicacy, received me with much kindness; and, after giving me a hearty welcome to -, presented me to her two daughters, girls about fourteen or fifteen, with ruddy complexions, and every appearance of health and contentment. We found with them a Mr. Plowshare, a young gentleman of the neighbourhood, who, I afterwards learned, farmed his own estate, and was considered by my father as the most respectable man in the county. They immediately got into a dissertation on farming, and the different modes of agriculture practised in the different parts of the country, which continued almost without interruption till some time after dinner, when my father fell fast asleep. But this made no material alteration in the discourse; for Mr. Plowshare and the ladies then entered into a discussion of the most approved methods of feeding poultry and fattening pigs, which lasted till the evening was pretty far advanced. It is now some months since I arrived at my father's; during all which time I have scarcely ever heard any other conversation. You may easily conceive, Sir, the figure I make on such occasions. Though the good-nature of my mother-in-law prevents her from saying so, I can plainly perceive that she, as well as my sisters, consider me as one who has been extremely ill educated, and as ignorant of every thing that a young woman ought to know.

When I came to the country, I proposed to pass great part of my time in my favourite amusement of reading; but, on inquiry, I found that my father's library consisted of a large family Bible,

« ՆախորդըՇարունակել »