every concern his heart had to dif pofe of. The morning which had promised fo much fatisfaction, had been over-clouded with circumstances, both unlooked for, and unpleasant. -As the poor fellow's pride was to be as fmart as poffible, whenever any females were to be of his party; in gallanting one of them into the boat, at the Parade ftairs, he unfortunately flipt almost up to his knees in the muddy water, and quite disfigured his white filk ftockings.This was an event which might have difconcerted a better FRENCH philofopher than LA PIERRE, and was but a prologue to worfe difafters ;-for a fresh breeze fpringing up, when they had got about a mile from the fhore, the toffing of the waves fo difturbed his empty ftomach, as to make him wretchedly wretchedly fick, till he got aboard the INDIA-MAN;-the civility of every one there, made him foon forget what he had fuffered;-he purchased the little trifles he wifhed;- and would have returned to fhore perfectly fick, and happy again, had not fome cuftom-house officers hailed the boat, and stripped from him, and his party, the poor fix-penny cargoes they had been fo far to fetch; nor was this all-for they took away befides the new INDIA filk handkerchief he had bought in the morning, and which, in his hurry to fet off, he had forgot to put out of his pocket. Quels miferables! cries LA PIERRE -quels barbares! -That, fays I,-and fending them to the devil in good FRENCH, is all you have for it. -Why, Why, what do you think, Sir, added he, the king can get by his duty on a couple of INDIA Fans, that kis people are fo watchful for his intereft? of That is a question, returned I, that might have puzzled the calculations your countryman, DE MOIVRE,— but confidering the number of hands it rubs against, before it reaches the Exchequer, I fhould conceive his net profit could not exceed the four hundredth and seventy-third part of one of your liards. I am an avowed enemy to all counterband dealings,as well as to all the little dirty infolence of office-but if you had not been a novice in thefe matters, you might have obtained an easier folution to your queftion, by offering a reftitution reftitution fee, and fo purchafing your fans a fecond time. Mon Dieu! exclaims LA PIERRE, what offer a bribe, Sir, to a king's fervant? Ab! pour cela, oui, or to a king's mistress, or to a king's any thingonly give it a different name.-Modern language hath made it palatable to all ranks, under the idea of acknowledgment, or attention; - as the disgustful ingredients of an apothecary's vial, are swallowed without reluctance, when the label denotes it to be a cordial mixture.- Now as this cordial mixture mult, like all other cordials, be administered for various purposes, as alfo to various conftitutions, and be fo tempered, as to act either as a ftimu lator, lator, or soporific, as occafion may require, it is expedient, that it be always judiciously applied; and, when well adapted to the ftomach that is to receive it, can very rarely fail of infuring fuccefs. -No one better understood how to manage a bribe artfully, or to tamper with the paffions, than the Abbè FRONTIN. He was, perhaps, too much addicted to pleasure, and intrigue, but had much wit, and infinite goodhumour;-he poffeffed a prefence of mind, equal to any emergency; and was fo happy in his address, as to be almoft irresistible. - By the by, I have never gone into the church of SAINT SULPICE at PARIS, without lamenting, that he fhould lie there without having even a ftone of two feet fquare to record |