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Conceited gowk !e puff'd up wi' windy pride! This monie a year I 've stood the flood an' tide; And tho' wi' crazy eildf I'm sair forfairn,g I'll be a brig when ye 're a shapeless cairn;" As yet ye little ken about the matter, But twa-three winters will inform ye better. When heavy, dark, continued, a'-day rains, Wi' deepening deluges o'erflow the plains; When from the hills where springs the brawling Or stately Lugar's mossy fountains boil, [Coil, Or where the Greenock winds his moorland course, Or haunted Garpali draws his feeble source, Arous'd by blust'ring winds an' spotting thowes,k In monie a torrent down his snaw-broo rowes;1 While crashing ice, borne on the roaring speat, in Sweeps dams, an' mills, an' brigs, a' to the gate; And from Glenbuck," down to the Ratton-key, Auld Ayr is just one lengthen'd, tumbling sea; Then down ye 'll hurl-deil nor ye never rise! And dash the gumlie jaupsP up to the pouring skies: A lesson sadly teaching, to your cost,

That architecture's noble art is lost.


Fine architecture! trowth, I needs must say't o't, The L-d be thankit that we 've tint the gateq o't! Gaunt, ghastly, ghaist-alluring edifices, Hanging with threat'ning jut, like precipices;

e Cuckoo; applied as a term of contempt.

g Worn out.

f Old age. h A loose heap of stones. The banks of Garpal Water is one of the few places in the west of Scotland, where those fancy-scaring beings, known by the name of Ghaists, still continue pertinaciously to inhabit.

k Thaws.

Snow-water rolls.

m A sweeping torrent after a thaw.
"The source of the river Ayr.

A small landing-place above the large quay.

p The muddy jerks of agitated water. q Lost the way of it.

O'er-arching, mouldy, gloom-inspiring coves,
Supporting roofs fantastic, stony groves;
Windows and doors in nameless sculpture drest,
With order, symmetry, or taste unblest;
Forms like some bedlam statuary's dream,
The craz'd creations of misguided whim;
Forms might be worshipp'd on the bended knee,
And still the second dread command be free,
Their likeness is not found on earth, in air, or sea.
Mansions that would disgrace the building taste
Of any mason, reptile, bird, or beast;
Fit only for a doited' monkish race,
Or frosty maids, forsworn the dear embrace;
Or cuifs of latter times, wha held the notion
That sullen gloom was sterling true devotion;
Fancies that our guid Burght denies protection,
And soon may they expire, unbless'd with resur



O ye, my dear-remember'd ancient yealings," Were ye but here to share my wounded feelings! Ye worthy Proveses, an' monie a Bailie, Wha in the paths of righteousness did toil ay; Ye dainty Deacons, and ye doucew Conveeners, To whom our moderns are but causey-cleaners; Ye godly Councils wha hae bless'd this town, Ye godly Brethren of the sacred gown, Wha meekly gae your hurdies to the smiters; And (what would now be strange) ye godly


A' ye douce folk I've borne aboon the broo, Were ye but here, what would you say or do? How would your spirits groan in deep vexation, To see such melancholy alteration;

r Stupifed.
u Coevals.

s Blockheads.
w Wise.

1 Borough.

x The loin

And, agonizing, curse the time and place
When ye begat the base degen'rate race?
Nae langer rev'rend men, their country's glory,
In plain braidy Scots hold forth a plain braid story!
Nae langer thrifty citizens an' douce,

Meet owre a pint, or in the council-house;
But staumrel, corky-headed, graceless gentry,
The herryment and ruin of the country;

Men, three-parts made by tailors and by barbers, Wha waste your weel-hain'd gear on d-d new brigs and harbours!


Now haudd you there! for faith ye 've said enough,
And mucklee mair than ye can make to through.
As for your priesthood, I shall say but little,
Corbies and clergy are a shot right kittle :"
But under favour o' your langer beard,
Abuse o' magistrates might weel be spar'd:
To liken them to your auld-warld squad,
I must needs say comparisons are odd.
In Ayr, wag-wits nae mair can haet a handle
To mouth a' citizen,' a term o' scandal:
Nae mair the council waddles down the street,
In all the pomp of ignorant conceit;

Men wha grew wise priggin' owre hops an' raisins,
Or gather'd lib'ral views in bonds and seisins.
If haply Knowledge on a random tramp,
Had shor'd' them with a glimmer of his lamp,
And would to Common-sense, for once betray'd


Plain, dull Stupidity stept kindly in to aid them.

What farther clishmaciaverm might been said, What bloody wars, if sprites had blood to shed,

y Broad. z Wise, prudent. a Half-witted. b Plunderers. c Well-saved money. d Hold. e Much. f Make out, or prove. species of crows.

g A

h Ticklish, difficult to come at. l Offered.

k Cheapening.

i To have.

an idie tale.

No man can tell; but all before their sight,
A fairy train appear'd in order bright:
Adown the glitt'ring stream they featly danc'd
Bright to the moon their various dresses glanc'd:
They footed o'er the wat'ry glass so neat,
The infant ice scarce bent beneath their feet:
While arts of minstrelsy among them rung,
And soul-ennobling Bards heroic ditties sung.
O had M'Lauchlan," thairmo-inspiring sage,
Been there to hear this heavenly band engage,
When through his dear strathspeys they bore with
Highland rage;

Or when they struck old Scotia's melting airs,
The lover's raptur'd joys or bleeding cares;
How would his Highland lugP been nobler fir'd
And e'en his matchless hand with finer touch

No guess could tell what instrument appear❜d.
But all the soul of Music's self was heard;
Harmonious concert rung in every part,

While simple melody pour'd moving on the heart
The Genius of the stream in front appears,
A venerable chief advanc'd in years:
His hoary head with water-lilies crown'd,
His manly leg with garter-tangle bound:
Next came the loveliest pair in all the ring,
Sweet Female Beauty hand in hand with Spring,
Then, crown'd with flow'ry hay, came Rural Joy,
And Summer, with his fervid-beaming eye:
All-cheering Plenty, with her flowing horn,
Led yellow Autumn wreath'd with nodding corn;
Then Winter's time-bleach'd locks did hoary shew,
By Hospitality with cloudless brow.

Next follow'd Courage with his martial stride, from where the Feal wild-woody coverts hide;

A well-known performer of Scottish music on the violin.

• Fiddle-string.

p Ear. 9 Sea-weed. Field, meadow.

Benevolence, with mild, benignant air,


A female form, came from the tow'rs of Stair Learning and Worth in equal measures trode From simple Catrine, their long-lov'd abode : Last, white-rob'd Peace, crown'd with a hazel To rustic Agriculture did bequeath [wreath,

The broken iron instruments of Death; At sight of whom our Sprites forgat their kindling wrath.


Written with a pencil, standing by the Fall of Fyers,
near Loch-Ness.

AMONG the heathy hills and ragged woods
The roaring Fyers pours his mossy floods;
Till full he dashes on the rocky mounds,
Where, thro' a shapeless breach, his stream re-
As high in air the bursting torrents flow, [sounds.
As deep recoiling surges foam below.

Prone down the rock the whit'ning sheet descends,
And viewless Echo's ear, astonish'd, rends.
Dim seen thro' rising mists and ceaseless show'rs,
The hoary cavern, wide-surrounding, low'rs.
Still thro' the gap the struggling river toils,
An' still, below, the horrid cauldron boils-


Written with a pencil, over the chimney-piece, in the parlour of an inn at Kenmore, Taymouth.

ADMIRING Nature in her wildest grace,
These northern scenes with weary feet I trace;
O'er many a winding dale and painful steep,
The abodes of covey'd grouse and timid sheep,
My savage journey, curious, I pursue,

ill fam'd Breadalbane opens to my view.-
The meeting cliffs each deep-sunk glen divides,
The woods, wild-scatter'd, clothe their ample sides
Mrs. Stewart. See note c, P. 59.

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