An' doucely manage our affairs

In parliament,

To you a simple Poet's prayers

Are humbly sent.

Alas! my roupet Muse is hearse !P

Your Honours' heart wi' grief twad pierce,
To see her sitting on her a-e

Low i' the dust,

An' scriechin' out prosaic verse,

An' like to brust!

Tell them wha hae the chief direction,
Scotland an' me's in great affliction,
E'er sin' they laid that curst restriction
On Aquavitæ ;

An' rouse them up to strong conviction,
An' move their pity.

Stand forth, an' tell yon Premier youth,
The honest, open, naked truth:
Tell him o' mine an' Scotland's drouth,
His servants humble:

The muckle Devil blaw ye south,
If ye dissemble!

Does onie great man glunch an' gloom?
Speak out, an' never fash your thumb !
Let posts an' pensions sink or soomt

Wi' them wha grant 'em

If honestly they canna come,

Far better want 'em.

In gath❜ring votes you were na slack;
Now stand as tightly by your tack;
Ne'er claw your lug," an' fidge your back,
An' hum an' haw;

But raise your arm, an' tell your crack

Before them a'.

r Frown.

e Hoarse, as with a cold. p Hoarse. 9 Great.
Don't be afraid-never trouble your head about it.
u Ear.

Swim.

D

Paint Scotland greetin' owre her thrissle,
Her mutchkin stoup as toom 's a whissle;
An' d-mn'd Excisemen in a bussle,

Seizin' a stell,

Triumphant crushin' 't like a mussel
Or lampitb shell.

Then on the tither hand present her,
A blackguard Smuggler right behint her,
An' cheek-for-chow a chuffiec Vintner,
Colleaguing join,

Picking her pouchd as bare as winter
Of a' kind coin.

Is there that bears the name o' Scot,
But feels his heart's bluid rising hot,
To see his poor auld mither's pot

Thus dung in staves,

An' plunder'd o' her hindmost groat
By gallows knaves?

Alas! I'm but a nameless wight,

Trode i' the mire an' out o' sight!

But could I like Montgomeries fight,

Or gab like Boswell,

There's some sark-necks I wad draw tight,

An' tie some hose well.

God bless your honours, can ye see 't,
The kind, auld, cantie carlinh greet,1

An' nok get warmly to your feet,

An' gar them hear it,

An' tell them wi' a patriot heat,

Ye winnam bear it!

Thistle-the national emblem. a A still, used for making whisky. c Fat-faced. d Pocket. flo speak boldly.

& Not.

7 Make.

g Shirt-collars. m Will not.

Some o' you nicely ken the laws,
To round the period, an' pause,
An' wi' rhetoric clause on clause

To mak harangues;

Then echo thro' Saint Stephen's wa's

Auld Scotland's wrangs.

Dempster," a true-blue Scot I'se warran;
Thee, aith-detesting, chaste Kilkerran ;P
An' that glib-gabbet Highland baron,

The laird o' Graham ;
An' ane, a chap that's d-mn'd auldfarran,
Dundas his name.

Erskine, a spunkie Norland billie;
True Campbells, Frederick, an' Ilay;
An' Livingstone, the bauld Sir Willie;
An' monie ithers,

Whom auld Demosthenes or Tully

Might own for brithers.

Thee, sodger Hugh,t my watchman stented,
If bardies e'er are represented;

I ken if that your sword were wanted,

Ye'd lend your hand,
But when there's ought to say anent it,
Ye're at a stand.

Arouse, my boys! exert your mettle,
To get auld Scotland back her kettle ;"
Or, faith! I'll wadw my new pleugh-pettle,*
Ye'll see't or lang,

She'll teach you wi' a reekin' whittle,

Anither sang.

He

n George Dempster, Esq., of Dunnichen, Forfarshire. was many years M. P. for the Dundee district of boroughs, and always spoke and voted on the liberal side of politics.

This while she's been in crankousa mood,
Her lost Militiab fir'd her bluid;
(Deil na they never mair do guid,

Play'd her that pliskie !c)

An' now she's like to rin red-wud,d

About her whisky.

An' L-d! if ance they pit her till 't,*
Her tartan petticoat she 'll kilt,

An' durk an' pistol at her belt,

She'll tak the streets,

An' rin her whittle to the hilt,

I' the first she meets.

For G-d's sake, Sirs! then speak her fair,
An' straik her cannies wi' the hair,

An' to the muckle Househ repair,

Wi' instant speed,

An' strive, wi' a' your wit an' lear,

To get remead,k

Yon ill-tongu'd tinkler, Charlie Fox,
May taunt you wi' his jeers an' mocks ;
But gie him 't het, my hearty cocks!

E'en cowe the caddie ;

An' send him to his dicing box

An' sporting lady.

Tell yon guid bluid" o' auld Boconnock's,
I'll be his debt twa mashlum bonnocks,"
An' drink his health in auld Nanse Tinnock's,P

a Fretful.

Burlesque allusion to the bill for a Scotch militia, which was, shortly before that time, negatived in Parliament.

c A trick.
d Run stark mad.
fTo truss up the clothes.
hThe parliament house.

• Hot.

e Put her to it. g Stroke her gently. Learning. k Remedy.

m Frighten the fellow, make him knock under.

n Good blood.

• Two bannocks or cakes made of mixed corn. p A worthy old hostess of the Author's in Mauchline, where he metimes studied politics over a glass of guid auld Scotch drink.

Nine times a week,

If he some scheme, like tea an' winnocks,
Wad kindly seek.

Could he some commutation broach,
I'll pledge my aith in guid braid Scotch,
He need na fear their foul reproach
Nor erudition,

Yon mixtie-maxtier queer hotch-potch,
The Coalition.

Auld Scotland has a raucle tongue;
She's just a devil wi' a rung ;t

An' if she promise auld or young

To tak their part,

Though by the neck she should be strung,
She 'll no desert.

An' now, ye chosen Five-and-Forty,"
May still your mither's heart support ye;
Then, though a minister grow dorty,

An' kick your place,

Ye'll snap your fingers, poor an' hearty,
Before his face.

God bless your honours a' your days
Wi' sowps o' kail an' brats o' claise,

In spite o' a' the thievish kaesz

That haunt Saint Jamie's!

Your humble Poet sings an' prays

While Rab his name is.

POSTSCRIPT,

Let half-starv'd slaves, in warmer skies,
See future wines, rich-clustʼring, rise—

91ea and windows; an allusion to Mr. Pitt's
r Confusedly mixed. s Rash, fearless.
u The Scotch members of parliament.
Sups of kail-broth. y Rags of clothes.

commutation tax.
t A cudgel.
w Saucy.
z Jack-daws.