THE PADLO C K ; A COMIC OPERA, IN TWO ACTS, BY ISAAC BICKERSTAFF. DRAMATIS PERSONE. DON DIEGO Two Scholars. LEONORA URSULA. ACT I. which time, I entered into a bond of four thousand pistoles, either to return her to them spotless, with half that sum for a dowry, or make her my true and lawful wife. Urs. And, I warrant you, they came secretly to inquire of me, whether they might venture to trust your worship. Lord! said I, I have lived with the gentleman nine years and three quarters, come Lammas, and never saw anything uncivil by him in my life; nor no more I ever did; and to let your worship know, if I had, you would have mistaken your person; for I bless heaven, though I'm poor, I'm honest, and would not live with any man alive that should want to handle me unlawfully. SCENE I-A Garden belonging to Don Diego's Dieg. Ursula, I do believe it; and you are parti House. Enter Don DIEGO, musing. AIR.-DIEGO. Thoughts to council-let me see- A husband, is the question. But fear makes the danger seem double: Not so much as a mouse; Then horns, horns, I defy you. Dieg. Ursula! Urs. Here, an't please your worship. Dieg. Where is Leonora ? Urs. In her chamber, sir. Dieg. There is the key of it; there the key of the best hall; there the key of the door upon the first flight of stairs; there the key of the door upon the second; this double locks the hatch below; and this the door that opens into the entry. Urs. I am acquainted with every ward of them. Dieg. You know, Ursula, when I took Leonora from her father and mother, she was to live in the house with me three months; at the expiration of ACT DRAMA.-NO. 13 cularly happy, that both your age and your person exempt you from any such temptation. But, be this as it will, Leonora's parents, after some little difliculty, consented to comply with my proposal; and, being fully satisfied with their daughter's temper a conduct, which I wanted to be acquainted with, this day being the expiration of the term, I am resolved to fulfil my bond, by marrying her to-morrow. Urs. Heaven bless you together. Dieg. During the time she has lived with me, she has never been a moment out of my sight: and now tell me, Ursula, what you have observed in her? Urs. All meekness and gentleness, your worship; and yet, I warrant you, shrewd and sensible; egad! when she pleases, she can be as sharp as a needle. Diey. You have not been able to discover any particular attachments? Urs. Why, sir, of late I have observed- Urs. That she has taken greatly to the young kitten. Dieg. O is that all? Urs. Ay, ay, of the kitten, and your worship, and her birds, and going to mass. I have taken notice of late, that she is mighty fond of going to mass, as your worship lets her, early of a morning. Dieg. Well! I am now going to her parents, to let them know my resolution. I will not take her with me, because, having been used to confinement, and it being the life I am determined she shall lead, it will be only giving her a bad habit. I shall return with the good folks to-morrow morning; in the 22 meantime, Ursula, I confide in your attention; and take care, as you would merit my favour. Urs. I will, indeed, your worship; there is not a widow gentlewoman in all Salamanca fitter to look after a young maiden. Dieg. Go, and send Leonora to me. [Erit CRSULA. I dreamt last night that I was going to church with Leonora to be married, and that we were met on the road by a drove of oxen. I don't like oxen! I wish it had been a sheep. Oxen ; flock of [Erit. Enter LEONORA, with a bird on her finger, which she holds in the other hand by a string. Dieg. I am going this evening to your father and mother, and I suppose you are not ignorant of the cause of my journey. Are you willing to be my wife? Leon. I am willing to do whatever you and my father and mother please. Dieg. But that's not the thing: do you like me? Dieg. What do you sigh for? Leon. I don't know. Dieg. When you came hither, you were taken from a mean, little house, ill situated, and worse furnished; you had no servants, and were obliged, with your mother, to do the work yourself. Leon. Yes, but when we had done, I could look Dieg. I say, then, I took you from that mean habitation, and hard labour, to a noble building, and this fine garden; where, so far from being a slave, you are absolute mistress; and instead of wearing a mean stuff gown, look at yourself, I beseech you; the dress you have on is fit for a princess. Leon. It's very fine, indeed. Dieg. Well, Leonora, you know in what manner you have been treated since you have been my companion; ask yourself again now, whether you can be content to lead a life with me according to the specimen you have had. Leon. Specimen ! Dieg. Ay, according to the manner I have treated you according Leon. I'll do whatever you please. Dieg. Then, my dear, give me a kiss. Leon, Good bye to yo Dieg. Here, Úrsula! SONG. DIEGO. By some I am told That I'm wrinkled and old; But I will not believe what they say: Leon, Heigho! I think I am sick. He's very good to me, to be sure, and it's my duty to re wish I was not to marry him for all that, though him, because we ought not to be ungrateful; bu? I I'm afraid to tell him so. Fine feathers, they say, make fine birds; but I am sure they don't make happy ones; a sparrow is happier in the fields than a goldfinch in a cage. There is something makes me mighty uneasy. While he was talking to me, I thought I never saw anything look so ugly in my life. O dear now, why did I forget to ask leave to go to mass to-morrow? I suppose, because he's abroad, Ursula won't take me. I wish I had asked leave to go to mass. SONG.-LEONORA. Were I a shepherd's maid, to keep SCENE II-A Street in Sa.amanca Enter LEANDER and two Scholars, in their university gowns. house, like another monastery, or rather prison; hs Leand. His name is Don Diego. There's his servants are an ancient duenna, and a negro slave1 Schol. And after having lived fifty years a bachelor, this old fellow has picked up a young thing of sixteen, whom he by chance saw in a balcony! 2 Schol. And you are in love with the girl? indifferent to her; for finding that her jealous Leand. To desperation; and I believe I am not guardian took her to the chapel of a neighbouring there in the habit of a pilgrim, planting myself as convent every morning before it was light, I went near as I could; I then varied my appearance, convinced she had sufficiently remarked and understood tinuing to do so, from time to time, till I was conmy meaning. there is not a more industrious lad in the university 1 Schol. Well, Leander, I'll say that for you, of Salamanca, when a wench is to be ferreted. 2 Schol. But pr'ythee, tell us now, how did yea get information ? Leand. First, from report, which raised my ce riosity; and afterwards from the negro I just oow mentioned. I observed that when the family were gone to bed, he often came to air himself at yonder grate. You know I am no bad chanter, nor a very scurvy minstrel; so taking a guitar, clapping black patch on my eye, and a swathe upon one of my legs, I soon scraped acquaintance with my friend Mungo. He adores my songs and sarabanús, and taking me for a poor cripple, often repays me Leand. And so, sir, he has told me all the secrets of his family; and one worth knowing: for he informed me last night, that his master will this evening take a short journey into the country, whence he proposes not to return 'till to-morrow, leaving his young wife, that is to be, behind him. 2 Schol. Zounds! let's scale the wall. Leand. Fair and softly. I will this moment go and put on my disguise, watch for the Don's going out, attack my negro afresh, and try if, by his means, I cannot get into the house; or, at least, obtain a sight of my charming angel. 1 Schol. Angel! is she then so handsome? Leand. It is time for us to withdraw: come to my chambers, and there you shall know all you can desire. [Exeunt two Scholars. SONG.-LEANDER. Hither, Venus, with your doves, What locks, what bars should then impede, SCENE III-The outside of Don Diego's house, which appears with windows barred up, and an iron grate before an entry. Dieg. Can you tell truth? Mungo. What you give me, massa? Dieg. There's a pistreen for you; now tell me, do you know of any ill going on in my house? Mungo. Ah, massa, a dn deal. Dieg. How! that I m a stranger to? Mungo. No, massa, you lick me every day with your rattan; I'm sure, massa, that's mischief enough for poor neger-man. Dieg. So, so. Mungo. La. massa, how could you have a heart to lick poor neger-inan, as you lick me last Thursday? Dieg. If you have not a mind I should chastise you now, hold your tongue. Mungo. Yes, massa, if you no lick me again. Mungo. You know, massa, me very good servant. Mungo. And ought to be use kine Dirg. If you utter another syllabic Mungo. And I'm sure, massa, you can't deny but I worky worky. I dress a victuals, and run a errands, and wash a house, and make a beds, and scrub a shoes, and wait a table. Dieg. [Beats him.] Take that. Now will you listen to me? Mungo. La massa, if ever I saw Dieg. I am going abroad, and shall not return 'till to-morrow morning. During this night I charge Enter Don DIEGO from the house, having first un-you not to sleep a wink, but be watchful as a lynx. locked the door, and removed two or three bars which assisted in fastening it. Dieg. With the precautions I have taken, I think I run no risk in quitting my house for a short time. Leonora has never shown the least inclination to deceive me; besides, my old woman is prudent and faithful, she has all the keys, and will not part with them from herself: but suppose-suppose-by the rood and St. Francis, I will not leave it in her power to do mischief. A woman's not having it in her power to deceive you is the best security for her fidelity, and the only one a wise man will confide in; fast bind, safe find, is an excellent proverb. I'll e'en lock her up with the rest; there is a hasp to the door, and I have a padlock within which shall be my guarantee; I will wait 'till the negro returns with the provisions he has gone to purchase; and clapping them all up together, make my mind easy by having the key they are under in my pocket. and keep walking up and down the entry, that if you hear the least noise, you may alarm the family. Stay here, perverse animal, and take care that nobody approaches the door; I am going in, and shall be out again in a moment. [Exit into the house. Mungo. So I must be stay in a cold all night, and have no sleep, and get no tanks neither; den him call me tief, and rogue, and rascal, to tempt me. SONG.-MUNGO. Dear heart, what a terrible life am I led! My pains is dere yame: Me wish to de lord me was dead. Whate'er's to be done, Oh! oh! Me wish to de lord me was dead. [DIEGO having entered from the house during the song, MUNGO goes in, and appears to bolt the door on the inside.] Dieg. [Unseen, puts on a large padlock.] That must do till I get a larger. Exit. Enter LEANDER disguised. Leand. So, my old Argus is departed, and the evening is as favourable for my design as I could wish. Now to attract my friend Mungo; if he is within hearing of my guitar, I am sure he will quickly make his appearance. MUNGO appears at the grate. Mungo. Who goes dere? Hip, hollo! Leand. Heaven bless you, my worthy master, will your worship's honour have a little music this evening? and I have got a bottle of delicious cordial here, given me by a charitable monk of a convent hard by, if your grace will please to taste it. Mungo. Give me a sup tro a grate: come closee, man; don't be fear; old massa gone out, as I say last night, and he no come back before to-morrow; come, try moosic, and give us song. Leand. I'll give your worship a song I learned in Barbary when I was a slave among the Moors. Mungo. Ay, do. Leand. There was a cruel and malicious Turk, who was called Heli Abdalah Mahomet Schah; now this wicked Turk had a fair Christian slave named Jezabel, who not consenting to his beastly desires, he draws out his sabre, and is going to cut off her head; here's what he says to her.-[Sings and plays.] Now you shall hear the slave's answer.-[Sings and plays again.]-Now you shall hear how the wicked Turk, being greatly enraged, is again going to cut off the fair slave's head. Now you shall hearMungo. What signify me hear? Me no understand. Leand. Oh, you want something you understand? If your honour had said that Enter URSULA at the window. Urs. Mungo! Mungo! Mungo. What devil you want? Urs. What lewd noise is that? Mungo. Lewd you self, no lewd here; play away, never mind her. Urs. I shall come down if you go on. Mungo. Ay, come along, more merrier; nothing here but poor man, he sing for bit of bread. Urs. I'll have no poor man near our door; harkye, fellow, can you play the "Forsaken Maid's Delight," or "Black Bess of Castile ?" Ah, Mungo, if you had heard me sing when I was young. Mungo. Gad! I'm sure, I hear your voice often enough now you old. Urs. I could quaver like any blackbird. Mungo. And now you grunt like an old sow. Come, throw a poor soul a penny, he play a tune for you. Urs. How did you lose the use of your leg? Leand. In the wars, my good dame: I was taken by a Barbary corsair, and carried into Sallee, where I lived eleven years and three quarters upon cold water and the roots of the earth, without having a coat on my back, or laying my head on a pillow: an infidel bought me for a slave: he gave me the strappado on my shoulders, and the bastinado on the soles of my feet: now this infidel Turk had fiftythree wives, and one hundred and twelve concubines. Urs. Then he was an unreasonable villain. Mungo. How many wives had he? Leand. Fifty-three wives, and one hundred and twelve concubines. Mungo. Poor man! what de devil did he do wid dem all? Enter LEONORA at the window. Leon. Ursula ! Urs. Od's my life, what's here to do! Leand. Do, worthy madam, let the young gentle. woman stay; I'll play her a love song for nothing. Urs. No, no, none of your love songs here; if you could play a saraband indeed, and there was room for one's motion Leand. I am but a poor man; but if your ladyship will let me in as far as the hall or the kitchen, you may all dance, and I sha'n't ask any thing. Urs. Why, if it was not on my master's account, I should think no harm in a little innocent recreation. Mungo. Do, and let us dance. Leand. Has madam the keys then? Leand. Have you the key of this padlock too, madam? Here's a padlock upon the door, heaven help us! large enough for a state prison. Urs. Eh,-how,-what! a padlock! Mungo. Here it is, I feel it; adod! it's a tumper. Urs. He was afraid to trust me then. Mungo. And if de house was a fire, we none of us get out to save ourselves. Leand. Well, madam, not to disappoint you and the young lady, I know the back of your gardenwall, and I'll undertake to get up at the outside of it, if you can let me down on the other. Urs. Do you think you could with your lame leg? Urs. Then, by my faith, you shall; for now I am set on't-A padlock! Mungo, come with me into the garden. [Erit with MUNGO. Leon. Pray let me go with you. Leand. Stay, charming creature; why will you fly the youth that adores you? Leon. O, lord! I'm frightened out of my wits! Leand. Have you not taken notice, beauteous Leonora, of the pilgrim who has so often met you at church? I am that pilgrim; one who would change shapes as often as Proteus, to be blessed with a sight of you. Re-enter MUNGO and URSULA. go back; fine work we shall have indeed; good man, good bye. Leon. I could not stay any longer by myself; pray let me take a little air at the grate Shall it be so? If you say no, I will not go. I must consent, however loath; But, whenever we desire, Make him promise to retire. Nay, marry, he shall take his oath. Leand. By your eyes of heavenly blue; By your lips' ambrosial dew; Your cheeks, where rose and lily blend; Your voice, the music of the spheres SCENE 1.-A Hall in Don Diego's house, with folding-doors which open in the back scene. On one side a stair-case, leading to an apartment; on the other, a door leading to a cellar. A table with a iottle and glass, two candles, a guitar, and LEAN DER'S disguise, placed upon it. Enter LEANDER in a rich habit, following URSULA. Urs. Oh! shame; out upon't, sir; talk to me no more. I, that have been famed throughout all Spain, as I may say, for virtue and discretion; the very flower and quintessence of duennas;—you have cast a blot upon me; a blot upon my reputation, that was as fair as a piece of white paper; and now I shall be reviled, pointed at, nay, men will call me filthy names upon your account. Leand. What filthy names will they call you? Urs. They'll say I'm an old procuress. Leand. Fie! fie! men know better things. Besides, though I have got admittance into your house, be assured I shall commit no outrage here; and if I have been guilty of any indiscretion, let love be my excuse. Urs. Well, as I live, he's a pretty young fellow. Leand. You, my sweet Ursula, have known what it is to be in love; and, I warrant, have had admirers often at your feet; your eyes still retain fire enough to tell me that. Urs. They tell you no lie; for, to be sure, when 1 was a young woman, I was greatly sought after; nay, it was reported that a youth died for love of me; one Joseph Perez, a tailor by trade; of the greyhound make, lank, and if my memory fail me not, his right shoulder about the breadth of my hand higher than his left; but he was as upright as an arrow; and, by all accounts, one of the finest workmen at a button-hole! Leand. But where is Leonora ? Urs. Where is she? By my troth, I have shut her up in her chamber, under three bolts and a double lock. Leand. And will you not bring us together? Urs. Who, 1? How can you ask me such a question? Really, sir, I take it extremely unkind." Leand. Well, but you misapprehend Urs. I told you just now, that if you mentioned that to me again, it would make me sick; and so it has, turned me upside down as it were. Leand. Ursula, take this gold. Leand Only for the love of me. Urs. Nay, if that be all, I won't refuse it, for I love you, I assure you; you put me so much in mind of my poor dear husband; he was a handsome man; I remember he had a mole between his eye-brows, about the bigness of a hazel-nut; but, I must say, you have the advantage in the lower part of the countenance. Urs. Gad-a-mercy, your cheek! Well, well, I have seen the day-but no matter, my wine's upon the lees now; however, sir, you might have had the politeness when a gentlewoman made the offer.But heaven bless you! [Exit. Enter MUNGO. Mungo. Ah! massa! You brave massa, now; what you do here wid de old woman? Leand. Where is your young mistress, Mungo? Mungo. By gog, she lock her up. But why you no tell me before time, you a gentleman? Leand. Sure I have not given the purse for nothing. Mungo. Purse! what, you giving her money den? Curse her imperance; why you no give it me? You give me something, as well as she. You know, massa, you see me first. Leand. There, there, are you content? [Giving him money.] Mungo. Me get supper ready, and now me go to de cellar. But I say, massa, ax de old man now, what good him watching do, him bolts, and him bars, him walls, and him padlock? Erit. Leand. Hist! Leonora comes. To boot, We dance and we sing, Till we make a house ring, And, tied in his garters, old massa may surng. [Exit at cellar door. SCENE II.-Interior of Don Diego's house. Enter LEANDER, LEONORA, and URSULA, Leand. Oh, charming Leonora! how shall I express the rapture of my heart upon this occasion? I almost doubt the kindness of that chance which has brought me thus happily to see, to speak to you, without restraint. Urs. Well, but it must not be without restraint; it can't be without restraint; it can't, by my faith; now you are going to make me sick again. Leon. La! Ursula, I dare say the gentleman doesn't want to do me any harm-Do you, sir? I'm sure, I would not hurt a hair of his head, nor noLody's else, for the lucre of the whole world. |